alec

[🇱🇹 @agneponx]

Can you believe that somewhere in the UK right now there is a uni fresher who is getting ready to start their empty alcohol bottle collection to display out the window of their accom, Godspeed my friend enjoy it whilst it lasts

[C H E L B! 🌭 @chelbb_]

Transgender operations *spins giant wheel* on illegal aliens *spins giant wheel* in prison

[⚪️ @owenthfc__]

When I walk into a Puregym at 5PM on a Thursday

[notfunny @apnaj2]

Male vs Female Motivation at the gym 😂:

[Chris Chats Shirt @ChatShirt]

Going out without a jacket in the summer:

3pm. 9pm.

[harry @_hxrrybxtt]

i dunno i beg to differ

[sophie @netcapgirl]

“siri, tell that bad bitch from hinge that im free tonight”

[Wes Streeting @wesstreeting]

Rishi Sunak lied to you.

He’s sent his ministers out to lie to you.

They were told not to lie to you.

You can’t believe a word they say.

[Henry Zeffman @hzeffman]

EXCLUSIVE

The chief Treasury civil servant wrote to Labour two days ago saying that the £38 billion/£2,000 tax attack “should not be presented as having been produced by the civil service”

He said he had reminded ministers of this

[ALASTAIR CAMPBELL @campbellclaret]

THREE HUNDRED AND EIGHTY State schools have closed since the Tories came in. THREE HUNDRED AND EIGHTY. How many times did any of them lead a newspaper or get on the TV news? Might that be because so many of our senior media people use private schools? The Mail front page today1/2

[Led By Donkeys @ByDonkeys]

Goodbye Gove. You were wrong about almost everything.

[Wes Streeting @wesstreeting]

Coalition of chaos?

We’ve had enough of that.

Choose change with Labour.

[Sadiq Khan @SadiqKhan]

🚨 Susan Hall is the most dangerous candidate I've ever faced.

Before you give her an X, read her X.

A thread:

[aiyana @aiyanajadee]

Well I’m sold

[Brian Cox @ProfBrianCox]

Very sorry to hear Peter Higgs has died. I was fortunate enough to meet him several times, and beyond being a famous physicist - I think to his embarrassment at times - he was always charming and modest. And of course his name will be remembered as long as we do physics in the form of the Higgs Boson. RIP Peter.

[Michael Brown @MrMBrown]

Compulsory listening every time it does the rounds... 😂

[.🇵🇹🇧🇷🇨🇮 @TGM_007]

a woman in a sundress & painted white toe nails with sandals is a deadly combo .

[low yield lucy @picotop]

finance guys when they realize global warming is affecting ski season.