Alex

Narcissism- n. Morbid self love or self-adoration. That is why I am here.

[Alex @alekshjohnson]

One great thing about working in a team of women is that when you unexpectedly bleed through your jeans you get a Greek chorus that wails “fuck off! Go home! Today is a write off!”

[Alex @alekshjohnson]

@hephaestiyum Yessss the dream

[Alex @alekshjohnson]

Vibrating with excitement actually.

[Leviticus @leviticusfilm]

It will never stop.

Joe Bird and Stacy Clausen star in LEVITICUS, written and directed by Adrian Chiarella. Only in theaters June 19.

[Alex @alekshjohnson]

Nothing makes me want to take a pen to my own jugular more than [serious voiceover, inspirational music swell, something something sport unites us, voiceover kicks it up a notch, three word slogan].

[Alex @alekshjohnson]

I don’t get sports but Philly GF means I get drafted into Philly sports content by default, and the Flyers almost had me paying attention to hockey. Then I saw everyone getting emo over the playoffs hype reel and was immediately reminded why I’m not a sports guy.

[Alex @alekshjohnson]

@hephaestiyum Loooove

[Alex @alekshjohnson]

Didn’t take a birthday selfie for three years and now we’re here. Still tired, hair better.

[Alex @alekshjohnson]

Annual birthday selfie. 33. Still tired. Still need a haircut,

[Alex @alekshjohnson]

@hephaestiyum These rule!!!

[Alex @alekshjohnson]

@hephaestiyum Omg tailor made for you

[Alex @alekshjohnson]

@hephaestiyum YES!!!!

[Alex @alekshjohnson]

@hephaestiyum Begging you to be in marginally more clothing for the inevitable next time, I cannot have you dying by king brown

[Alex @alekshjohnson]

Dramatically changing the tone of the karaoke evening by doing Suicidal Tendencies ‘Institutionalised’

[Alex @alekshjohnson]

@hephaestiyum Establishing a complex series of catch 22s for my fave’s friends and lovers to fall into so I can get really mad

[Alex @alekshjohnson]

@hephaestiyum Honestly, I have a free day. It might not be an oil painting but, I think I can work this up lol

[Alex @alekshjohnson]

@hephaestiyum Obviously he is Satan and must be punished

[Alex @alekshjohnson]

@hephaestiyum Oooh I really like the decomposition books

[Randa Abdel-Fattah @RandaAFattah]

My statement in response to the racist decision to cancel me from Adelaide Writers' Week.

[Alex @alekshjohnson]

Exiting Turnstile yesterday we walked past a kid complaining that “the pit was full of 90 zillion over thirties… gross!!!” And look, the way I’m complaining about my neck this morning… sure, yeah

[Alex @alekshjohnson]

My hair is incredibly grown out and I will be telling my perfect angel hairdresser next time I see her.

[Alex @alekshjohnson]

My New Year’s Day has been perfect in the sense that an extremely hot gay man pulled me aside on the dance floor to tell me that he was a hairdresser and that my haircut was good and that I was pretty.