Alias Jones

Red Sox fan, a family man, and a former fisher of men. I strive to preserve morality and justice because our future depends on it. Cheers!

[Alias Jones @alias_cojones]

@pubity Don’t call GLP-1 hard work and disciplined.

[Alias Jones @alias_cojones]

@EternalFaithEO Wait, he wasn’t white with blonde hair and blue eyes like every western artist has depicted him?

[Alias Jones @alias_cojones]

@Jared_Carrabis He’s had the shits for the last three days. They need to cut him some slack. Probably had some bad lettuce.

[Alias Jones @alias_cojones]

@CoveredGeekly Looks like he’s main lining GLP-1s. That shit is addicting to overweight people that get results. They don’t know how to quit out of fear of gaining it back.

[Alias Jones @alias_cojones]

@chefsevenn Black coffee.

[Alias Jones @alias_cojones]

@C2Cbsbl Except he hasn’t touched a weight since high school PE and has the face of a drunk. Get him in the gym, home early at night during the season, and less concerned about social media likes and he’ll be great.

[Alias Jones @alias_cojones]

@TolkienWorldG With a plate that small in front of Astin, this has to be second dinners.

[Alias Jones @alias_cojones]

@TrevorSanne3 Said the same thing last night about Story. No way you send down Monasterio right now for Story to hop in with his mid arm and constant whiffs.

[Alias Jones @alias_cojones]

@TheSove68049909 @ValliantRenegad Thanks for saving me from posting this. If you know, you know.

[Alias Jones @alias_cojones]

@LangmanVince I thought that was Corey Feldman at first.

[Alias Jones @alias_cojones]

@Jared_Carrabis Probably thinks it’s fan appreciation day with Marcelo holding a child’s mitt.

[Alias Jones @alias_cojones]

@tylermilliken_ No Casas. No Houck. No Story. No Crawford. No IKF.

No problem.

[Alias Jones @alias_cojones]

@rixlerr Marshals is a sack of turds, but otherwise I agree with what he’s saying. Only TS show I stopped watching and that was after trying four episodes. I jumped to the finale and turned that off halfway through, too.

[Alias Jones @alias_cojones]

Besides Triston and his immediate family, I’m not sure anyone cares. His injury track record far exceeds Marcelo’s and the Sox should never depend on him to be a future 1st baseman when he can do simple tasks like run to first baseman or swing a bat without injuring his ribs and knees for months at a time.

[Alias Jones @alias_cojones]

@RealRobReinhart I’ve been calling him Jizz Chasm for years so I can see why one might screw that up!

[Alias Jones @alias_cojones]

@cezanjr @MLBTheShow I’m with you, but the cover is always a curse, brother!

[Alias Jones @alias_cojones]

@Jared_Carrabis Sending Jarren home in a trade with LA while in town.

[Alias Jones @alias_cojones]

@DanBFox1287 It's because we've heard nothing but hot dog shit about his medical condition that's true. Literally no medical findings to explain his wrist pain from swinging a bat... 1/2 of his f'ing job.

[Alias Jones @alias_cojones]

@Jared_Carrabis The guy is struggling with some mental health issues. Be easy on him. It's a game versus this dude's life. Fake an injury on him like they do with everyone else and let him reset.

[Alias Jones @alias_cojones]

@Jared_Carrabis Aura is overflowing.