alex merfu

certified hypocrite 🦀

[alex merfu @allbrainnocells]

Per my empirical observations, there exist three types of cis men:
1. Those that get a cat post breakup
2. Those that get a cat during relationship
3. Single men that get cats for companionship
1 scares me to the core. 2 is safe. 3 is on thin ice.

[alex merfu @allbrainnocells]

Vish just told me I need to go to composure school. 😜🤪

[alex merfu @allbrainnocells]

@saavn420 I relate. You are not alone

[alex merfu @allbrainnocells]

IM SORRY WHOSE FUCKING TOENAILS ARE ON MY GODDAMN BALCONY WHAT THE ABSOLUTE FUCKERY IS THIS

[alex merfu @allbrainnocells]

My blood runs borscht wtf do u know about being Slavic

[alex merfu @allbrainnocells]

They drank the koolaid #mtlpride

[alex merfu @allbrainnocells]

@adamstopit Nope! Hope this helps :))

[smallville @fiamepoint]

today's affirmations:
- i am the one thing in life i can control
- i am inimitable
- i am an orginal
- i'm not falling behind or running late
- i'm not standing still
- i am lying in wait

[alex merfu @allbrainnocells]

Guys tmi but I found the ultimate strat to curing my public poop anxiety and that is pooping in places I will never go again (ex: Boston museum of fine arts, airport, etc). We really going up this year #Unstoppable #nostresspoops2025

[alex merfu @allbrainnocells]

@raisinsex #wouldyousellyoursoulforamilliondollars

[alex merfu @allbrainnocells]

I just said have a good night to my uber eats delivery man. It’s 11:53am. I’m killing myself after eating this, I just wanted to give yall a heads up <3

[alex merfu @allbrainnocells]

@elonmusk Art has and will always be full of political/social/economic/cultural commentary. To say that art and story are separate from representing societal ills demonstrates a complete lack of understanding of literally the human experience

[alex merfu @allbrainnocells]

@ancill_angela @JustinTrudeau Go repost some trump propaganda or some shit touch grass

[alex merfu @allbrainnocells]

@wihtwyrd @Alien_Frank1 @jukiebell_is_me @JackPosobiec You’d have to put me in a classroom with Vance himself before I ever believe he wrote a single word Cicero wrote. Further, the idea of him QUOTING classical literature but pushing forward a hierarchy of love to “prove the left wrong” is testament to his idiocy (pun intended)

[wer @demonibrat]

happy thursday

[coochie mane 🧪 @lsdcuredme]

wanna get my girl in these so i can pet her bush through it like a sensory book

[alex merfu @allbrainnocells]

All for rage bait, I just find it funny how quebecois people are so quick to defend a language they can barely spell but insist that it’s dying….who is forgetting its grammar dumbass tabarnak

[vivi @mooncatvivi]

love when ppl are like “do you wanna come with me” Um YES memememememe take me with you i love being included im comingggggggg yayyyyyyy