Ally Ottimo

Instagram - @allyottimo

[Ally Ottimo @allyottimo]

Hey @Chilis bring back the fried picklesssssss, please.

[Ally Ottimo @allyottimo]

@Chilis wtf…bring back the fried picklesssss. also @apple make a pickle emoji.

[Ally Ottimo @allyottimo]

Hey, @ReeseW - my niece knows that orange would never be the new pink #seriouslydisturbed …ps peep Bruiser Woods in the Birkin bag 💁🏼‍♀️

[Ally Ottimo @allyottimo]

@rockdoll_x @amandabickkk She goes I’m stuck..I really am 😂😂😂

[Ally Ottimo @allyottimo]

@abbatharose It was terrible. And no one @ me.

[Ally Ottimo @allyottimo]

Taking back Sunday is playing in this bar, and I’m feeling 14 and drunk.

[Ally Ottimo @allyottimo]

Just wondering #thingsiaskjoyce

[Ally Ottimo @allyottimo]

I’m thankful I don’t have to draw my eyebrows on. #earlythanksgivingtweet

[Ally Ottimo @allyottimo]

To the patient that just shit in a urine specimen cup...WHY?!

[Ally Ottimo @allyottimo]

@jesscaaa23 You think the ones who don’t get roses get cats instead and then sent home?

[Ally Ottimo @allyottimo]

YO! people are crazy. just wanted you guys to know.

[Ally Ottimo @allyottimo]

God laughs at girls who shave before they think they’re gonna get some...and end up not.

[Ally Ottimo @allyottimo]

Just wanna shoutout to @FIJIWater for rounding out the bottom of the water bottles, they successfully fit in my cup holder now #REALMVP

[Ally Ottimo @allyottimo]

Malls are open today right? It’s American to spend money right?

[Ally Ottimo @allyottimo]

There’s a child laying on the floor in the middle of CVS screaming to her mom she’s tired, I’ve never related to anything more.

[Ally Ottimo @allyottimo]

I just stopped for 45 seconds and said good morning and hello to my neighbors dog...@dperullo_ Oakley’s outside just so ya know.

[Ally Ottimo @allyottimo]

I wonder how much paper I consumed as a child eating candy buttons.

[Ally Ottimo @allyottimo]

@dperullo_ Let’s put it all together and split the profits

[Ally Ottimo @allyottimo]

@dperullo_ I wonder how much money my unopened water bottles are gonna be worth!!!

[Ally Ottimo @allyottimo]

I used to love 4/20 and celebrating being a stoner, now I’m just spending my day paying bills and cleaning my apartment. #imightbehightho