Al Rudock

[Wendy "#ChurchOfAllCats" Fleet 😹💙🌊 @time4kind]

. Ha + Ha . .

[The Halfway Post @HalfwayPost]

BREAKING: A "Trump TV" documentary about Stephen Miller has reportedly been scrapped because the director says Miller comes across like "if Joseph Goebbels and Nosferatu had a baby who was abandoned in a cave at birth and adopted and raised by a grand dragon of the KKK."

[Awful Announcing @awfulannouncing]

Ref: "Unsportsmanlike conduct, defense, No. 1, for simulating using the restroom."

Kirk Herbstreit: "Just an absolute idiotic move by Colin Simmons doing that."

Chris Fowler: "Yeah, it's idiotic, and it doesn't get much more vulgar, either."

[Joe Z Wales @JoeZWales3]

@Gopack28

[Mike&Mildred @mikenmildred]

Good morning 🤣

[Buck @Buck93407064]

@glenn_tunes Where's original 10 billion peace Board money?

[Alan Love @altwodogs]

@_TheGMan I took my wife into a Chinese restaurant and whilst we were waiting for our meal a 6 foot duck came over to my wife, handed her a single red rose, played guitar and sang loves to her, apparently the waiter misheard her when she ordered aromatic duck.

[George Eagle @_TheGMan]

So I carefully pulled the bag down..
And there it was..

...A Peeking Duck

[Al Rudock @AlRudock]

@BradKlibansky “Letter of the law” eh? The AFL has what they wanted and the matchup they preferred. Kabuki theatre. What hypocrisy.

[Al Rudock @AlRudock]

@IhabFathiSulima Is that a liver biopsy? Why I get scared with AI with people without a proper foundation in the area in question. No one in their right mind wound insert an intercostal catheter with a trocar in that fashion.

[Ana @ana_in_tx]

My therapist suggested that I get an emotional support animal.

I got a chicken.

It came in a bucket with a side of mac and cheese and a sweet tea.

I feel better already.

[FeelGoodThoughts @feelgoodtale]

A PLANE IS ON ITS WAY TO TORONTO , WHEN A BLONDE IN ECONOMY CLASS GETS UP AND MOVES TO THE FIRST CLASS SECTION AND SITS DOWN.

THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT WATCHES HER DO THIS AND ASKS TO SEE HER TICKET.

SHE THEN TELLS THE BLONDE THAT SHE PAID FOR ECONOMY CLASS AND THAT SHE WILL HAVE TO SIT IN THE BACK.

THE BLONDE REPLIES, "I'M BLONDE, I'M BEAUTIFUL, I'M GOING TO TORONTO AND I'M STAYING RIGHT HERE."

THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT GOES INTO THE COCKPIT AND TELLS THE PILOT AND THE CO-PILOT THAT THERE IS A BLONDE BIMBO SITTING IN FIRST CLASS, THAT BELONGS IN ECONOMY AND WON'T MOVE BACK TO HER SEAT.

THE CO-PILOT GOES BACK TO THE BLONDE AND TRIES TO EXPLAIN THAT BECAUSE SHE ONLY PAID FOR ECONOMY SHE WILL HAVE TO LEAVE AND RETURN TO HER SEAT.

THE BLONDE REPLIES, "I'M BLONDE, I'M BEAUTIFUL, I'M GOING TO TORONTO AND I'M STAYING RIGHT HERE."

THE CO-PILOT TELLS THE PILOT THAT HE PROBABLY SHOULD HAVE THE POLICE WAITING WHEN THEY LAND TO ARREST THIS BLONDE WOMAN WHO WON'T LISTEN TO REASON.

THE PILOT SAYS, "YOU SAY SHE IS A BLONDE? I'LL

HANDLE THIS, I'M MARRIED TO A BLONDE. I SPEAK BLONDE."

HE GOES BACK TO THE BLONDE AND WHISPERS IN HER EAR, AND SHE SAYS, "OH, I'M SORRY." AND GETS UP AND GOES BACK TO HER SEAT IN ECONOMY.

THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT AND CO-PILOT ARE AMAZED AND ASKED HIM WHAT HE SAID TO MAKE HER MOVE WITHOUT ANY FUSS.

"I TOLD HER, 'FIRST CLASS ISN'T GOING TO TORONTO."

[Earle L. Bailey 🇮🇪🇬🇧🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🇸🇪🇩🇰 @Altanon]

Many thanks to Brian Krassenstein!

“The weirdest thing about leaving America is realizing how much of America is just a sales pitch.

You spend your whole life hearing “greatest country on Earth,” then you go overseas and see clean trains, safer streets, affordable medicine, cities where people can walk without playing Frogger with an SUV, and workers who take vacations without acting like they committed treason.

And then you come home.

You come home to potholes, medical debt, school shooting drills, $17 airport sandwiches, people living in tents under highways, politicians wearing flag pins (or worse, gun pins) while doing absolutely nothing for the people standing in food bank lines, and billionaires being treated like they’re the fragile ones.

And somehow we’re all supposed to stand there, hand over heart, and pretend this is normal.

I don’t hate America. I hate what America has been taught to tolerate.

I hate that we call basic things “radical.” Healthcare? Radical. Paid leave? Radical. Clean air? Radical. Kids not getting shot in math class? Somehow political.

Meanwhile, the loudest “patriots” are usually the same people telling struggling Americans to shut up, stop complaining, and be grateful.

Grateful for what? A flag doesn’t pay rent. A bald eagle doesn’t cover insulin. Fireworks don’t fix bridges. And chanting “USA” doesn’t make a broken system less broken.

America has incredible people. That’s the tragedy. The people are better than the system they’ve been forced to defend.

So no, I’m not going to call America the greatest country on Earth just because it has the best marketing department.

Real patriotism isn’t pretending the country is perfect.

Real patriotism is being angry that it isn’t”

- Brian Krassenstein

[Fake History Hunter @fakehistoryhunt]

Just watching an old documentary tonight, something about data centers, ai and robots.

[Al Rudock @AlRudock]

@RalphyHeraldSun Impressive how strongly the hypocrisy runs in the replies. Hatred of Hawthorn- “thems da rules’. For Lachie? Hey man Grand Final!! Ginny faked it. All good here. As so many of you like to utter, “get in the bin”!!!!

[BO$$ Dawg @BOSSDAWG75]

100% TRUTH 🤣🤣🤣🏌🏾‍♂️⛳️

[James Tate @JamesTate121]

The French made a contraption for this.

[Cyrus Janssen @thecyrusjanssen]

One has to give credit where credit is due…the trolling is next level