Alyssa Dessero

[Alyssa Dessero @AlyssaMarni]

Nothing has given me more hope for the future than Lindsay Lohan right now.

[Alyssa Dessero @AlyssaMarni]

If you looked up to Baby Spice as a kid, it’s time for an 8 step skincare routine. There’s nothing “baby” about your face anymore.

[Alyssa Dessero @AlyssaMarni]

Parenthood is knowing that your son has 10 different Lightning McQueen cars, but only one fave.

[Alyssa Dessero @AlyssaMarni]

The amount of times I guess if my car can make a turn is astonishing. Knock on wood, haven’t been wrong yet!

[Alyssa Dessero @AlyssaMarni]

I love it when my husband says he can’t afford to get sick. Like seriously who can? I’m so curious.

[Alyssa Dessero @AlyssaMarni]

Just when I thought I could make a new friend, they go and tell me they’re a vegetarian.

[Alyssa Dessero @AlyssaMarni]

360 degree photo booths are my biggest nightmare. I have a good side. Why would I want to show the world everything else?

[Alyssa Dessero @AlyssaMarni]

I cannot wait for this cold season to be over. I’ve realized I cannot stand the sound of people coughing. Nails on a chalkboard. Anyone else?

[Alyssa Dessero @AlyssaMarni]

Picked up my daughter from school feeling kinda hood. She got in the car and said “Mommy I didn’t know you listened to rapper music”. Oh sweet girl, there’s so much you don’t know…

[Alyssa Dessero @AlyssaMarni]

I used to think men were so well calculated, great engineers… then I saw one load the dishwasher.

[Alyssa Dessero @AlyssaMarni]

Apple’s technology amazes me, my phone’s Face ID recognized with a sheet mask on.

[Alyssa Dessero @AlyssaMarni]

Just saw a girl wearing her vans with the tags hanging. Are people still doing that?

[Alyssa Dessero @AlyssaMarni]

@BarbaraCorcoran loved you on GMA this morning. Where is your top from?!?

[Salud Juice @SaludJuice]

#TBT to our grand opening full of sun, smiles, and popsicles!🍭 Were you there for our big day?
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@buddypops #mysalud #longbeach #juicebar #iamwellandgood #juicelife #saludon4th #lbretrorow #sjgrandopening #buddypops

[Alyssa Dessero @AlyssaMarni]

Drinking my Starbucks, driving a mini-van, in yoga pants. Better turn up the volume on my gangster rap before I completely turn into my mother.

[The Chew @thechew]

The very first episode of #TheChew aired on September 26, 2011, and with 1500 shows later, the final taping is officially in the history books! Tune in tomorrow for our special farewell. You seriously don’t want to miss it. We love you @Clinton_Kelly, @ChefSymon, and @carlahall!

[Alyssa Dessero @AlyssaMarni]

Just saw a guy walking down the street playing the air guitar. I was in my car listening to Aerosmith. Not gonna lie, he was dead on.

[Alyssa Dessero @AlyssaMarni]

@kenoka912 The most intense end of game I’ve ever seen!

[Salud Juice @SaludJuice]

Lo and Wrinkles sample juice on Second Street. Does it get any cuter than this?? 👧🐶 // 📸 @alyssamarni #mysalud

[Alyssa Dessero @AlyssaMarni]

There’s no better feeling on Earth than when ur kid tells u their toy isn’t working, u change the batteries, and they literally think ur a hero.