IMAGINA O PRESIDENTE DA REPÚBLICA MANDAR ACABAR COM AS BETS NO FUTEBOL E DIAS DEPOIS O HERDEIRO DE DOIS BANCOS DECIDIR COMPRAR SEU TIME MEU DEUS ISSO É VASCO PORRA
My toddler loves Monsters Inc. especially Mike Wazowski.
Yesterday I was in Walmart and came across this cool t-shirt.
I immediately bought it, put it on in the car, and rushed home to show my toddler.
I hunted her down as soon as I came through the door.
She was sitting on the couch watching Hogi and eating Goldfish crackers.
I said, ‘Libby check out my cool new shirt!’
I was beaming. I just knew she was gonna think my shirt was the coolest shit ever.
She looked at me, looked at my shirt, scoffed, and yelled, ‘GO AWAY!’
Listen.
I don’t think we talk enough about what huge pieces of shit toddlers are.
That’s literally my TV you are watching.
I paid for those Goldfish crackers.
That’s my fucking couch.
I bought this cool t-shirt ONLY because of you.
And this is your response you f#ggot piece of sh!t??
You are wearing a shirt with a turtle on it that says, ‘Turtley Adorable’ you fuck!ng idiot.
You are broke.
Homeless.
Have poor life skills.
You can’t even fucking speak English.
You are basically a Somali immigrant only brighter in complexion and with much less forehead mass.
I’ll wipe my ass with this shirt.
Fuck this shirt.
Bitch nigga.
Your mom is fat.
lembrando de que quando eu tava no 4° ano a modinha era responder o "quem te perguntou?" com "acabou de perguntar"
ai um dia um mlk falou isso pra mim e eu respondi "tira as calça e vai cagar" e a sala virou um zoologico na mesma hora pqp me senti assim
tempão ai?
-não, cheguei agora
nao nao tem pão ai?
-tempao tem não
nao tem pao ai nao?
-aah nao tem
tem ou nao tem
-nao tem o que?
? tem pao ai
- nao cheguei agora