Ashley-Marie Paladie

Life is a tragedy to those who feel, and a comedy to those who think.

[Ashley-Marie Paladie @ampaladie]

When your food turns out so well you reset your twitter password to tweet it to the world #Quarantine #Foodie #tasty #springrolls #wfpb #Vegan #iliketohashtag #SummerSolstice #firstdayofsummer

[Ashley-Marie Paladie @ampaladie]

@SpotifyCares I am really tired of the false promise of “30 min. ad free listening” after watching an ad. Today was another shining example of another 14 min. musical span interrupted by, yes, an advertisement. Either do what you say or state “ad free” is a payment prerequisite.

[Jimmy Kimmel @jimmykimmel]

NEW #MeanTweets #Oscars edition @RyanGosling Natalie Portman @SamuelLJackson Felicity Jones @WhoopiGoldberg Emma Stone @Jes_Chastain & more

[Jimmy Kimmel @jimmykimmel]

@realDonaldTrump #Merylsayshi

[zooey deschanel @ZooeyDeschanel]

My heart is filled with sadness for our French brothers and sisters. I am praying for Paris and for the victims of this senseless tragedy.

[Ashley-Marie Paladie @ampaladie]

Life update number 16: Craving chocolate chip muffins in bed and writing about it all as a poetic struggle betweee the heart and the stomach

[Ashley-Marie Paladie @ampaladie]

If one could, like, not exist for a moment in time, I would choose now. Like, right-this-very-second episode of now
#noragrets #yolofail

[Ashley-Marie Paladie @ampaladie]

@qajacobs On Union Avenue? Did you follow him up to the gates of Graceland?

[Ashley-Marie Paladie @ampaladie]

I have the sincere belief that inanimate objects are to blame for the vast majority of problems in my life.

[Ashley-Marie Paladie @ampaladie]

Dear Asshole,
ANSWER MY MESSAGES
Love,
Me :)

[zooey deschanel @ZooeyDeschanel]

Q. If you dress your baby in a black turtleneck is she dressed as a.)Audrey Hepburn b.)Steve Jobs or c.)Andy Warhol?

[Ashley-Marie Paladie @ampaladie]

I was addicted to the Hokey Pokey, but now I've turned myself around.

[Ashley-Marie Paladie @ampaladie]

If I pulled a you on you, you wouldn't like that.

[Ashley-Marie Paladie @ampaladie]

Trouble is her only friend and he's back again...Trouble is, the only way back is down #remember #allthelostsouls

[Ashley-Marie Paladie @ampaladie]

When the bastard green dot is so OBVIOUSLY showing they ARE online, but they still haven't responded to your message #seriously #facepalm

[Ashley-Marie Paladie @ampaladie]

Life update number 238: I am in Ecuador. The country. Literally thousands of miles away. So, no,I cannot run to the store for you. Seriously

[Ashley-Marie Paladie @ampaladie]

When ur in a restroom and the second you sit the auto lights go off and ur waving your arms like a looney for the sensor #firstworldproblems

[Ashley-Marie Paladie @ampaladie]

I have been restricted from alcohol for the next 48 hours in preparation for a vaccine shot. Now I want a drink. #reversepsychology

[Ashley-Marie Paladie @ampaladie]

Having the new guy explain why he is exempt from, "dirty work." #itsafarm #shithappens

[Ashley-Marie Paladie @ampaladie]

I fell for him like my heart was a mob informant and he was the East River. Alas...he was a Lacy. #foreveralone