Amy Harms

[Amy Harms @amykharms]

guys WHY am I craving that oatmeal that has little dino eggs in it and does anyone know what i’m talking about

[Amy Harms @amykharms]

HOW many times can one misplace the tape & scissors when wrapping xmas presents? asking for me.

[Amy Harms @amykharms]

I just found out that my bf doesn’t like my #1 baby name because it “doesn’t flow with his last name” so we’re gonna compromise by either taking my last name or breaking up

[Amy Harms @amykharms]

“you guys look like a group from the bachelor” - & that is the best compliment i’ve ever received.

[Amy Harms @amykharms]

@Sarah_Harms where’s the ‘never’ option?

[Amy Harms @amykharms]

my coworker- “are you fucking kidding me”
me- “what”
him- “oh sorry, I just checked my bank account”
& if that isn’t the most relatable thing.

[Amy Harms @amykharms]

why can boys wash their face once a month with the residue from their shampoo & still have perfect skin???

[Amy Harms @amykharms]

me- “hey today is national sex day”
my roommate- “I know & the only thing fucking me is life”

[Amy Harms @amykharms]

“he’s going to hang with the boys this weekend even though we had plans saturday LMAO i’m single for sure should I get tinder”

[Amy Harms @amykharms]

boys, stop asking me why I have “50” pillows & start asking yourselves why you only have 1 that is 10 years old.

[Amy Harms @amykharms]

my problem with eating peanuts in moderation is that I don’t know how to eat peanuts in moderation

[taylor pankiw @tpanks_]

why is waving on fb messenger even a thing.. like fucking say hi or literally anything else

[Amy Harms @amykharms]

srry but if u wear socks to bed ur psycho

[Amy Harms @amykharms]

hurts just a little when you go to Sephora & they remind you how much you spend there by telling you how many points you have

[Amy Harms @amykharms]

me @ the new epi of @CW_Riverdale

[Amy Harms @amykharms]

is it too early to watch halloween town? asking for a friend

[Amy Harms @amykharms]

lol love when I say i’m trying to get my sleeping schedule back on track as if it ever was on track LOL

[Amy Harms @amykharms]

me at 1:07 PM to my sister: “k I HAVE to go study now i’m serious”

[Amy Harms @amykharms]

shoutout to everyone who gave me money for my bday, y’all bought me groceries for the week #adulting

[Amy Harms @amykharms]

me at ikea: heaven
me at home with all the ikea furniture that needs to be put together: hell