andjrew

proud promoter of the oxford comma

[andjrew @andjrew1]

public bathrooms got some resident evil level environmental storytelling like woah.. what happened to this toilet.. how is it on the walls? what the hell happened here....

[andjrew @andjrew1]

college campuses really do give you a peek into what it would be like if the us had stronger public infrastructure... public bathrooms, universally accessible wifi, high turnover entry level jobs...

[andjrew @andjrew1]

nothing makes me more patriotic than diners and the fact that i can ask any food serving establishment for a water cup

[andjrew @andjrew1]

sf is being spiritually colonized can we not w the ai slop in my beautiful whimsical city

[andjrew @andjrew1]

there should be a rule that if your package doesnt come by the scheduled time you get to shoot your delivery driver

[andjrew @andjrew1]

35 billion dollar cox spectrum merger closed we are witnessing the monopolization of fiber internet in the us live and no one cares

[andjrew @andjrew1]

i like when youre pooping in a public stall and you can see shoes in the stall next to you and it feels like youre doing confession except youre pooping

[andjrew @andjrew1]

a restaurant's posted close time should be the time they stop seating

[andjrew @andjrew1]

@janalingurmom dont worry the amazon summer recruiter ones are fake lmaoo my coworker did it and they j made him a warehouse worker until he quit 3 days later 😭

[blair @gthmic]

all internet discourse leads back to this

[andjrew @andjrew1]

if someone was like yo do you wanna go to jupiter to get more stupider id prolly be like no im okay but im down for an alternate planet with candy

[Big Nate Season 2 🎃 @ndogid]

Working retail or driving a car really does open your eyes to the fact that most people are sub-sentient biosludge

[emilie @emiliepfrank]

everyone in these replies has clearly never had to get a large nonstandard size print framed or they have and they’re millionaires

[andjrew @andjrew1]

bro last night was a deleted scene that wouldve added much needed characterization

[andjrew @andjrew1]

if you drive a ford explorer dont drive like a narc

[andjrew @andjrew1]

@humanhamster1 breastament 🤤🤤🤤

[andjrew @andjrew1]

i think if you have an only child you need to accept the possibility your kid will probably grow up to be evil

[🟡 The tumboy 🟡 @TheTumboy]

maybe I’m too much of a literalist or a pedant or just stupid but I fundamentally didn’t understand what about his wish caused her to do stuff like this

[Haala ⚢ @haalaphrodyke]

"it's just a part 1" So was The Matrix Reloaded and Kill Bill Vol 1. You can watch either of those films and get a full movie worth seeing by itself