Dodgy Derek parody

I like to move it move it

[Liz Cheney @Liz_Cheney]

If your response to Gen John Kelly, gold star father & Trump’s WH chief of staff, confirming that Trump praised Hitler & called members of our military “suckers and losers” is to defend Trump, you need to look in the mirror and realize your dishonor will live forever.

[UNIFIL @UNIFIL_]

This morning, two peacekeepers were injured after an IDF Merkava tank fired its weapon toward an observation tower at UNIFIL’s headquarters in Naqoura, directly hitting it and causing them to fall. The injuries are fortunately, this time, not serious, but they remain in hospital.

[Dodgy Derek parody @andrelesac]

@Peston 🤮

[HENRY MORRIS @mrhenrymorris]

@trussliz Not saying don't trust this women, but she's organised her books by the colour on the spine, rather than by what's inside them.

[John W. Miller @jwmjournalist]

Why we need professional journalists: @JDVance rep tells @wsj about Anna Kilgore, a Springfield OH woman whose cat went missing in August, so @Kris_Maher drives to her house. She found the cat in her basement and apologized to her Haitian neighbors.

[Dodgy Derek parody @andrelesac]

@TLRailUK OK great, thanks

[Dodgy Derek parody @andrelesac]

@TLRailUK sadly my prediction was accurate - I emailed TfL about a week ago and have had no response. What do you suggest I do about my Delay Repay, given there is a time limit on claims, and no ETA from TfL for a fix?

[Dodgy Derek parody @andrelesac]

@TLRailUK Thanks, I didn't see the original response come through for some reason. Looks like TfL customer service isn't going to be much help for the time being...

[Dodgy Derek parody @andrelesac]

@trussliz 🤡

[Dodgy Derek parody @andrelesac]

@TLRailUK Thanks, I didn't see the original response come through for some reason. Looks like TfL customer service isn't going to be much help for the time being...

[Dodgy Derek parody @andrelesac]

Hi @TLRailUK , did you make any progress with this?

[Dodgy Derek parody @andrelesac]

@TLRailUK Hello Thameslink. As you probably know, TfL are having a mare. Contactless journey history is unavailable, with no ETA for a fix. How can I apply for Delay Repay in the meantime? Please and thank you

[Dodgy Derek parody @andrelesac]

@rustyrockets @TuckerCarlson Charlatan

[Dodgy Derek parody @andrelesac]

@TLRailUK No need for a DM, I can't access anything private. This is all you get (I've highlighted the relevant bit, at the bottom)

[Dodgy Derek parody @andrelesac]

@TLRailUK Hello Thameslink. As you probably know, TfL are having a mare. Contactless journey history is unavailable, with no ETA for a fix. How can I apply for Delay Repay in the meantime? Please and thank you

[Dodgy Derek parody @andrelesac]

@TLRailUK They've been affected by a cyber attack all week, contactless journey history is blocked as per this BBC News story https://t.co/n4FL5Dmxsy . Obviously that makes it difficult to upload proof of travel/fare to Delay Repay

[Dodgy Derek parody @andrelesac]

@CuriousUkTelly Noel Edmonds Willy

[Ally Fogg @AllyFogg]

I know it's bad to even mention Tate even to dunk on him but can't resist. The claim that people are nostalgic for Oasis because it reminds them of a time you had "no fear of being stabbed."

Utter horseshit. Violent crime peaked in 1995. There were 84,000 stabbings that year.

[Adam Payne @adampayne26]

An incredible claim in Sir Anthony Seldon's biography of Liz Truss:

She, according to the book, considered "stopping cancer treatment on the NHS" as a way of filling the financial blackhole

An adviser is said to have replied, "is she being serious?”

https://t.co/xRhY7kDbr2

[Viz Comic @vizcomic]

subscriptions >>> https://t.co/Ufr2YPVUWW

[@Searchlightmagazine @Searchlight_mag]

'Tommy Robinson' (real name Stephen Lennon) may have taken a powder and breezed off to the European Union he professes to hate, but his nose for drawing ridicule has certainly not deserted him. The pseudo-Irishman's latest gaffe is to indicate his support for a grand-scale drug-dealer imprisoned following a near riot in London's Whitehall.

David Notley is an East London career criminal with a string of convictions, most notably one which earned him a 20-year stretch in 2009. Notley had attempted to smuggle £400,000 worth of cocaine into the country via Tilbury docks. The drugs were hidden inside a consignment of pot plants from Nigeria.

Clearly 20 years have not passed since 2009, so Notley was only out of prison on licence when the rather stupid idea occurred to him to join in the 31 July protest in Whitehall, close to the end of Downing Street. The ruckus was organised by Robinson's factotum 'Danny Tommo' (real name Daniel Thomas), who wisely – though some on the far right are calling it out as 'cravenly' – scarpered the minute it looked like things were turning ugly.

Though now 67, Notley displayed no such inclination to preserve his own hide, pushing to the front of the protest and stirring up the crowd. When arrested on 13 August, he was immediately recalled to prison as a person on licensed release.

Prosecutor Alexander Ogbamu showed the court video footage of Notley's actions, stating "we could see Mr Notley had made his way to the front of that crowd who were confronting police. He struck fighting poses, surging back and forth, joined in chanting ‘you’re not English anymore’. He then helped to push another demonstrator into a police officer which precipitated a physical confrontation between police and demonstrators."

The court also heard that Notley called the police "c*nts" and joined in with anti-Muslim chants. He pleaded guilty to violent disorder and a religiously aggravated public order offence. Judge Freya Newbery sent him down for 20 months.

And the only part of this tale of woe reported by Tommy Robinson? "JAILED FOR CHANTING 'YOU'RE NOT ENGLISH ANYMORE'," he shouted on Twitter / X. "Let that sink in." As if all of the rest of Notley's actions - and his parole breach - didn't exist.

Honestly, Tommy, just because you think you've sniffed out a good 'two-tier policing' story, it doesn't excuse you not reporting the full facts. All you've done here is set the rest of us snorting – in derision, of course.

Pictures: Dope (left) and Dealer...

@uaf @AntiRacismDay

[Dodgy Derek parody @andrelesac]

@trussliz 1. No-one stopped you speaking, you just stropped off
2. No "far-left activists" involved
3. It was, in fact, piss funny
4. You have more than outstayed your welcome. Please just stop. Go and do something quietly somewhere. Britain is begging you politely to just go home