cabincrewmeme

Warning NSFW content
DM your Ⓜ️eme for a Feature
(ONLY MEMES PLZ)

[cabincrewmeme @animeblind]

"Flight 404 has a tight connection?" "Tell him, fittingly, that his connection is 'Not Found'."

[cabincrewmeme @animeblind]

"Congratulations, sir. It fits." "Unfortunately, the metal rack is now permanently welded to your luggage."

[cabincrewmeme @animeblind]

"Handle with Extreme Care?" "That is just industry code for 'Throw it underhand'."

[cabincrewmeme @animeblind]

"We don't call it 'Overbooking'." "We call it 'The Hunger Games: Economy Class Edition'."

[cabincrewmeme @animeblind]

"Tower is acting like a clingy ex." "Ghost them. Tell them we’re driving under a bridge."

[cabincrewmeme @animeblind]

"He keeps asking what state we are in?" "Tell him 'Solid'. If we turn into a liquid or gas, I'll let him know."

[cabincrewmeme @animeblind]

"Tread is for pilots who actually want to stop." "We’re going for 'Fast & Furious: Tarmac Drift' on this landing."

[cabincrewmeme @animeblind]

"Sir, we are at 35,000 feet." "Exactly. The dreaded 'Cloud Tunnel.' Just crinkle a candy wrapper into the mic."

[cabincrewmeme @animeblind]

"I call this 'Percussive Maintenance'." "It fixes the electrical contact and the behavioral issue simultaneously."

[cabincrewmeme @animeblind]

"Will you wait for me?" "Sir, this is a scheduled flight, not a loyal Golden Retriever. We are leaving."

[cabincrewmeme @animeblind]

Passenger: "This fit on my last flight!" Me: "Unless your last flight was on a cargo ship, I’m gonna call that a lie."

[cabincrewmeme @animeblind]

"We can fly with one engine." "We absolutely cannot fly with zero caffeine. Put it on the ground."

[cabincrewmeme @animeblind]

"Humans are basically large lizards." "If you cool them down enough, they stop moving. It's just science."

[cabincrewmeme @animeblind]

"It’s strictly BYOS today: Bring Your Own Sky." "No sky in your carry-on? Then get back in line behind the cargo plane."

[cabincrewmeme @animeblind]

(The Impossible Transfer) "Tell him to transfer to the subway at 30,000 feet." "And remind him to mind the gap between the fuselage and reality."

[cabincrewmeme @animeblind]

(The "Hydration Cartel" Theory) "She looks like a sweet grandmother." "In my eyes, she is just a mule for the illicit trade of 3.5-ounce lotions."

[cabincrewmeme @animeblind]

"This fish has more frequent flyer miles than the pilot." "It was fresh... back when this plane was still a blueprint."

[cabincrewmeme @animeblind]

"It’s not a loose bolt." "It’s a built-in maraca to enhance the in-flight entertainment."

[cabincrewmeme @animeblind]

Him: "That sounded like a vase." Her: "I can't hear you over the sound of me not filling out an incident report."

[cabincrewmeme @animeblind]

"Tell them 'ATC said no.' It's the pilot version of 'My mom won't let me go out.'" "They can't yell at a building they can't see."