no this is patrick

hands off peepin bob

[trash jones @jzux]

hey sorry i can’t make it tonight i’m hanging out disrespectfully with women in unstable places from my wild recent past

[charlie @chunkbardey]

4 times 3 being 12. that is a classic

[Hannah Yasharoff @HannahYasharoff]

Things I thought the Bama Rush documentary was going to be about:
⁃ Bama Rush

Things the Bama Rush documentary is actually about:
⁃ Alopecia
⁃ the Bama Rush documentary
⁃ the Bama Rush documentary director

[Pop Crave @PopCrave]

A cockroach has arrived at the #MetGala .

[no this is patrick @annaabelle_]

@ChipotleTweets Someone stole his burrito and he’ll be speaking to his manager about it

[Jen Looper, PhD @jenlooper]

This pretty much sums it up for me

[no this is patrick @annaabelle_]

My allergies would not be okay in any of these TLOU houses

[Hank Green @hankgreen]

Natural. Language. Processors. Can. Not. Know. When. They. Are. Lying.

[no this is patrick @annaabelle_]

Trader Joe’s cheddar chicken sausages have NO right being so good

[elly @wizardjarin]

When Bill brought the dinner and it was the same dish they had when they first met #TheLastOfUs

[no this is patrick @annaabelle_]

iDog 🤌🤌🤌

[Marques Brownlee @MKBHD]

iPod Nano

[Matt Margolis @ItsMattsLaw]

(completely overwhelmed) will do!

[carina adly mackenzie @cadlymack]

I have never shipped anyone as hard as I ship Andrew Garfield and the red carpet journalist

[🏴‍☠️ @cursedkief]

(most disappointed I’ve ever been in my life) no worries!

[no this is patrick @annaabelle_]

When a bot messages me on LinkedIn claiming to be “impressed by my experience” and offers me a pay cut and 4 days in office 🤌🤌