Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Fake

U.S. Congresswomyn. Bartender. Environmental Ward. Smart Purson. Parody.

[Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Fake @aocunreal]

I’ll never understand why everyone doesn’t sign on to my #NewGreenDeal.
It’s like killing 2 birds with one bullet.
Which is why we need common sense gun control. No one needs a gun powerful enough to kill 2 birds at once.
That is why they sell precooked chicken at Walmart.

[Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Fake @aocunreal]

The Auschwitz Museum has disputed that Trump runs concentration camps on the Southern boarder.

But come on, who are you going to believe?
I bet none of them can mix a Cosmopolitan.

Check mate.

[Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Fake @aocunreal]

If implying that ICE agents are Nazi concentration camp guards is wrong, I don’t want to be right.

[Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Fake @aocunreal]

If you think that calling things concentration camps when those things are literally not concentration camps is wrong, you are part of the problem.

[Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Fake @aocunreal]

If you don’t give us in Congress a pay raise, we’ll just get more corrupt. A raise will keep all of us honest, just like Maxine Waters.

[Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Fake @aocunreal]

I don’t know if I should root for Justin Bieber or Tom Cruise. Either way, I have to choose a white guy. I feel like this whole beef is racist. Where is the representation of POC?

[Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Fake @aocunreal]

@SenGillibrand Exactly, just because the women’s team can’t beat an under 15 boys team doesn’t mean they aren’t just as competitive as men.

[Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Fake @aocunreal]

We can use some of the $3 billion we didn’t give Amazon to move to NYC to pay for the Congressional pay raise.

[Kayla Elizabeth @VixenRogue]

Men RT me all the time. Maybe your tweets just suck.

[Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Fake @aocunreal]

The election results in the U.K., France, and Italy show that elections are not the answer.
#SocialismNow

[Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Fake @aocunreal]

I’m with the @Alyssa_Milano #SexStrike. I’m going to use my bodily autonomy and refuse to have sex to protest my lack of bodily autonomy!

[Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Fake @aocunreal]

We need to increase subsidies to Planned Parenthood so they can recoup lost profits due to the #SexStrike

[Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Fake @aocunreal]

Thanks for banning parody accounts of me @Jack

The last thing we need to support is the ideals of free speech. It was invented by old dead white men after all.

[Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Fake @aocunreal]

If some Muslims die during Ramadan, do we call them “Ramadan Worshippers?”

Asking for a friend.

[Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Fake @aocunreal]

Why did I delete the tweet falsely claiming an old white guy is a Republican when he is really a Democrat?

1. It’s only bad if Republicans do it.
2. It’s hard to tell old white guys apart. Amirite?

[Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Fake @aocunreal]

I would have condemned the Sri Lankan bombings over the weekend, but Muslims weren’t the targets.

[Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Fake @aocunreal]

I’m against revenge porn. Except when it comes to Republicans like Robert Kraft. Then I’m all for it.

[Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Fake @aocunreal]

Why do I throw out all the purple jelly beans?

Because you can’t spell grape without rape.

#TimesUp
#StopThePatriarchy

[Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Fake @aocunreal]

If you don’t condemn the Easter Bunny for being part of the patriarchy, you’re part of the problem.

[Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Fake @aocunreal]

Today we must remember the Easter Bunny doesn’t come to everyone.

Why?

#ClimateChange

[Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Fake @aocunreal]

The world ending in 12 years isn't all bad. I'll barely be in my 40s then. Who wants to be that old anyway?
#ClimateChange