Austin 🎵

buy a t-shirt

[Austin 🎵 @apetrashu]

I am here to ruin my life

[Austin 🎵 @apetrashu]

Up here, anywhere 1 hour away might as well be next door. But anywhere 2 hours away might as well be another country

[Austin 🎵 @apetrashu]

Every guy above 65 who owns a house and a big new truck and whose Social Security I pay $1,000-$2,000 for every year: “Man I’m so jealous of your life young fella you’re really living the dream”

[Austin 🎵 @apetrashu]

Guy with strap locks on his guitar: Ah sorry man I can’t take my strap off, I’ve got these strap locks on my guitar

[Austin 🎵 @apetrashu]

Call your own self “Sting” or “The Edge,” call a group some gibberish like “Bananarama” or even “Led Zeppelin” and nobody bats an eye. But call a 2-man band “Austin and the In-Laws” and people lose their minds

[Austin 🎵 @apetrashu]

I hate all my guitars equally

[Austin 🎵 @apetrashu]

🎵 Let’s go to Luckenbach, Texas with Waylon and Willie and The Void 🎵

[Austin 🎵 @apetrashu]

Giving up on the lucrative business of musical arts to follow my true dream: sealcoating asphalt

[Austin 🎵 @apetrashu]

Dawg I am straight up ready to be the guy playing sax to karaoke backing tracks in a mid Italian restaurant

[Austin 🎵 @apetrashu]

It’s a little funny that despite Johnny Cash and Waylon Jennings smoking like chimneys all their lives, it was going to Cracker Barrel too much that really did them in

[Austin 🎵 @apetrashu]

(in the style of Pearl Jam’s “Black”) I’m shittin’, WhoooaOhhOhh I’m shittiiiin’

[Austin 🎵 @apetrashu]

Reaching a point of musical crankery where I’m sick of hearing minor chords. Get out of here with that shit

[Austin 🎵 @apetrashu]

Ded Dead: A Dead Tribute to the Led Music of Grateful Zep

[Austin 🎵 @apetrashu]

I continue to claim that one day I’ll start a Morphine cover band

[Austin 🎵 @apetrashu]

Now they’re turning the tape speed down and slowly pitch shifting it for an early fade on the solo. What kind of nightmare Freebird am I trapped in. I feel like I’m about to faint

[Austin 🎵 @apetrashu]

I’ve never heard a version of “Freebird” broadcast without the intro til just now. What a fucking crime

[Austin 🎵 @apetrashu]

Using Proper Diaphragmatic Support to Blow My Nose

[Austin 🎵 @apetrashu]

At least until we run out of ideas and start using AI

[Austin 🎵 @apetrashu]

The In-Laws might start putting “No AI!” on our albums like Queen did with synthesizers

[Austin 🎵 @apetrashu]

Played a gig got paid and after food, gas, other car maintenance expense + light Christmas shopping at a discount retailer I have profited $7

[Austin 🎵 @apetrashu]

Today’s the day I learn there’s a guy named Les E. Claypool who is a sound recordist from the 90s and looks exactly like, but is not, Les E. Claypool from Primus