AP

Wannabe Fixed-Income guy. Overfitted for life.

[Conor McGregor @TheNotoriousMMA]

Come on Garry, fuck them all! Do it for your little crew bro, and never forget what they said against! We got the skills 1000%! ☘️

[The Babylon Bee @TheBabylonBee]

Karoline Leavitt Prepared For Motherhood After Spending Last Two Years Answering Millions Of Stupid Questions https://t.co/YfDXXMZEsm

[Susie Wiles @SusieWiles47]

Karoline, you have been nothing short of extraordinary. You have taken on one of the toughest jobs in Washington with confidence, discipline, grace and an unmatched ability to deliver the President’s message. Simply put, you are the greatest @PressSec .

But what has been equally special is that you’ve let us see the woman behind the podium. It has been a privilege to watch you excel as a professional while also being an incredible wife and devoted mom.

You’ve made all of us, who have had the privilege of working alongside you, so proud. I am blessed to call you dear friend and I’m excited to see what your next chapter looks like.

Congratulations, @karolineleavitt !

[Karoline Leavitt @karolineleavitt]

Serving as the White House Press Secretary over the past year and a half has been the honor and adventure of a lifetime. I am incredibly grateful to President Trump for granting me so many extraordinary opportunities, such as working in the West Wing and spending countless hours in the Oval Office, flying around the world and meeting foreign leaders, and traveling across our beautiful country and meeting Americans from all walks of life.

Most of all, I am thankful to the President for entrusting me with the distinct privilege of speaking on his behalf at the White House podium. I have spoken with great pride about the many historic accomplishments of this Administration, and I have relished holding the liberal media accountable and ensuring the American people hear the truth about President Trump’s successes.

Being a mother and welcoming a new baby while working in one of the most demanding jobs in the world has been the most rewarding yet challenging season of my life, to say the least. The truth is since returning to the White House after the birth of my daughter, I have felt in my heart that I cannot be the best mom my two young children deserve while devoting the constant time, energy, and attention required of the White House Press Secretary — and that is why I have ultimately made the bittersweet decision to depart the White House and embark on a new chapter in my life.

President Trump has asked me to continue serving as a top advisor to him on the outside, and I will always remain a vocal advocate for MAGA and the Republican Party.

Our country is facing an existential threat from an increasingly extremist Democrat Party that seeks to destroy everything great about America, and I believe it is incumbent upon all of us who care about this country to fight back against that threat. My fight is entering a new phase, but it is far from over.

Thank you again to the President, the First Lady, and the entire Trump family for your kindness and generosity over the years. Thank you to our amazing Chief of Staff Susie Wiles for empowering me since the day she hired me on the campaign, and to the President’s cabinet, my staff, colleagues, and friends at the White House who work so hard on behalf of our nation. It has been a privilege to serve alongside so many accomplished and impressive people, and I look forward to cheering them on over the next two and a half years.

And of course, thank you most especially to my loving and supportive husband and family for the sacrifices they made for me to serve in this role. ♥️🇺🇸

[The Incredible Hok @Josh_HokitUFC]

My mom does have a small mouth. With 9 inches in your mom’s mouth she starting speaking perfect English. And at the full 13, her Portuguese improved.

[Katie Miller @KatieMiller]

Marco Rubio is just not a diet guy:

“I tried keto once.

“It was a near-psychotic event for me. If I had been in this job while doing it, I would’ve been like, “Mr. President, we must bomb Paraguay.”

“And it’s like, why? I don’t know. I’m just really mad. I haven’t had any sugar.“

[Red Corner MMA @RedCorner_MMA]

Khabib says he never chased the GOAT title himself, but now wants Islam Makhachev to break the records of Jon Jones, GSP and Demetrious Johnson. 🐐

"That’s my goal, for someone closest to me to get there too. If Jon Jones is there, why can’t Islam be there? If Demetrious Johnson is there, why can’t Islam be there?

I’d like him to break all those records, to overtake Jon Jones, Demetrious Johnson, and GSP. No matter how much respect I have for them, Islam has a chance, but time is starting to run out a little."

Via: @lexfridman

[Happy Punch @HappyPunch]

Islam Makhachev just tried talking Alexander Volkanovski into coming to Dagestan for 2-3 weeks 😂

“Don’t say like Demetrious Johnson, ‘I have to ask my wife.’ Don’t say that bro.”

“I will have to actually ask my wife…” 💀

[Title Fight @TitleFightMedia]

Islam Makhachev got ANNOYED after Demetrious Johnson said he had to ask his wife about a trip to Dagestan 💀

“I gotta talk to the wife…”

“Talk to wife? You’re best fighter in the world bro. You have to ask? You have to tell her but not ask…”

(Via @MightyMouse / YT)

[The Curious Tales @thecurioustales]

No matter how many times I see this, I don’t understand it. 🤷🏽‍♂️

[CageMath @ThatCageMathGuy]

All set for #UFC330 fight day🔥

[Kunath @KunathSports]

No way Paddy vs Gaethje goes the distance

No way BMF fight goes the distance

No way Khamzat loses to Strickland

No way Gane walks thru Poatan

No way Gaethje breaks Topuria

No way Ian Garry becomes champion

[THE MMA GURU @THATBOYMMAGURU]

If the UFC can't find a top 5 opponent next for him then fuck it just let Quillan Salkilld easily destroy Usman Nurmagomedov in his debut real quick on a PPV main card #UFCVegas120

[Bo Loudon @BoLoudon]

"I'm transgender. I'm a woman. I identify as sometimes identifying as a woman for purpose of basketball... I'll be declaring for the WNBA draft in 2027 as well."

- Royce White (she/her)

If you don't think this is a beautiful woman, you're a transphobe.

[Max 📟 @MaxNordau]

Tucker Carlson preaches that debt is slavery, that lending at interest is the sin of usury, and that a society organized around debt "enslaves people."

He then reads an ad for a mortgage lender and personally endorses it: "We recommend American Financing. They're called America's home for home loans for a reason."

[Joshua Van @JoshuaVanBT]

We back September 19 !!!

[Ariel Helwani @arielhelwani]

On paper, very fun fight, but it’s an absolute crime Arman isn’t fighting for the belt next.

[moe @b33tlz]

this was the clip that made me decide to watch always sunny

[michael hess @mchlhess]

Friend making $20/hr as a server: “Don't worry, bro, this one's on me, and you'll get the next”

Friend making $470k as a senior software engineer: “Can you Venmo me $9.62 for your share of the Uber ride?”

[The Incredible Hok @Josh_HokitUFC]

I want the title, but if Tom & Cyril actually get ink’d then Alex & me for the BMF belt. Winner becomes next in line for the HWT title.