Arthur Smith

Comedian and night mayor of all Balham.

[Arthur Smith @ArfurSmith]

@StarrOutlook Yes though I was only 20 at the time

[Arthur Smith @ArfurSmith]

@MiserygutsPetty Made it to the https://t.co/7vt4GBnzbr

[Arthur Smith @ArfurSmith]

2am. I need 5 goals in the 1st half to stay awake

[Arthur Smith @ArfurSmith]

Is Ben Stokes really Vincent Van Gogh?

[Arthur Smith @ArfurSmith]

@SteveMitchell7A Agree. My fave too

[Arthur Smith @ArfurSmith]

I’ve had 85 hydration breaks today

[Arthur Smith @ArfurSmith]

@interallia @AndyBurnhamGM Of course

[Arthur Smith @ArfurSmith]

Yes the US football team is pretty good but surely Trump should be in the team because he is THE GREATEST PLAYER EVER!

[Arthur Smith @ArfurSmith]

Went for a walk in the woods today

[Arthur Smith @ArfurSmith]

As Mayor of Balham am currently in France at the G8 meeting discussing what to do about Clapham

[Arthur Smith @ArfurSmith]

https://t.co/02gAgHbrUH

[Arthur Smith @ArfurSmith]

Me as captain of the England under 12s team

[Arthur Smith @ArfurSmith]

@josielawrence1 @Go_SYH_In_A_Pig Appy birfdie gorgeous xx

[Arthur Smith @ArfurSmith]

I’m talking to John at this. See you there?

[John Crace @JohnJCrace]

Tickets still available for my London show at Leicester Sq theatre next Wed, June 10th. Please do come, and if you can't please be kind and repost so we might reach someone who can

https://t.co/pxMZ1lzT1S

[Arthur Smith @ArfurSmith]

This year I have already earned 47p on my Only fans account

[Arthur Smith @ArfurSmith]

As the mayor it is entirely acceptable that I have used Balham funds to purchase a pencil sharpener for ONLY £3,000

[Arthur Smith @ArfurSmith]

Can’t believe I’m not in the England World Cup squad 😔

[Arthur Smith @ArfurSmith]

I used to think Elon Musk was a brand of aftershave

[Arthur Smith @ArfurSmith]

Once again I have won with ‘The greatest Mayor of Balham’

[Arthur Smith @ArfurSmith]

Tonight in Sainsbury’s car park the Balhamovision song contest! Starts 8pm anyone can enter

[Arthur Smith @ArfurSmith]

Tonight in Sainsbury’s car park the Balhamovision song contest! Starts 8pm anyone can enter