Kate Murtha

I'm stuck in AR! Somebody help me get out of here!!!

[Kate Murtha @asgreataskate]

I just listened to and liked @iamcardib's "I Like It" and now I consequently hate myself

[Kate Murtha @asgreataskate]

#howtotellthedifference #olympicversion
Gay Roommate: "Yes, figure skating!!!"
Lesbian Me: "Yes, Women's Slalom!!!"
@JackASSon_

[Kate Murtha @asgreataskate]

@Forever21 How do you even finding anything in here?

[Kate Murtha @asgreataskate]

Lord help me, y'all! I'm going shopping in @Forever21 #anxietyattackin321

[Kate Murtha @asgreataskate]

@Running_84 This will be my roommate's future tweet

[Kate Murtha @asgreataskate]

When you are suppose to be learning a new task, but the person teaching you is only checking his email.... #whatisthepurpose?

[Kate Murtha @asgreataskate]

The girlfriend cooked me dinner! #shessosweet

[Kate Murtha @asgreataskate]

We're not best friends, we have that brother/sister, love/hate #friendship #imnotsurehowifeelaboutthat

[Kate Murtha @asgreataskate]

My girlfriend was #superhorny today, and it made being at work #reallyhard

[Kate Murtha @asgreataskate]

Guy at lunch sneezes.
I say "Bless you."
Guy at lunch ignores me.
#wellfuckyoutoo

[Kate Murtha @asgreataskate]

Why did my dumb ass decide to have a garage sale this morning?! #notamorningperson #gottamakethatmoney

[Kate Murtha @asgreataskate]

My dog just burped in my face, and I'm pretty sure she did it on purpose!!! #thatshitstinks

[Kate Murtha @asgreataskate]

#MyWeirdRoommate used to get high and eat ramen noodles raw straight out of the package #savage

[Kate Murtha @asgreataskate]

Do you ever hear a certain person's voice and just want to cut off your ear? #SHUTUP #coworkers

[Kate Murtha @asgreataskate]

Said @taylorswift13 to #everyone https://t.co/fJz1xiNq1D

[Kate Murtha @asgreataskate]

When you invite your best friend to your new crib, but she can't come because she's sick #TheseHoesAintLoyal #besties

[Cheque N. Blanco @BusterRythms707]

The best Star Wars hands down is Guardians of the Galaxy

[Kate Murtha @asgreataskate]

#mydad drives so slow that I didn't get out of 4th gear on the interstate #lordhelpusall

[Kate Murtha @asgreataskate]

#nowords 😂 https://t.co/iG9RHQcGG7

[Kate Murtha @asgreataskate]

@cynicalhumor Why yes, yes I do 🤔