sh🏔️ne

I like trees and oysters • one time a podcast I was on was removed from youtube for defaming Ron Watkins

[sh🏔️ne @ashaneintheass]

If I was an anti-government militia guy my screen name would be Hugh Jarsenal

[sh🏔️ne @ashaneintheass]

@CFA_United @calstate Why did I walk the picket lines all day just for CFA to cave? What was the point? What did I strike for? It seems all I won was a day spent walking around in the rain eating a soggy sandwich.

[sh🏔️ne @ashaneintheass]

@CFA_United @calstate 5% is a paycut. Did we really settle for this?

[sh🏔️ne @ashaneintheass]

On my way to Death Valley and can confirm, yet again, that desert people are freaks and not to be trusted

[sh🏔️ne @ashaneintheass]

Everybody who is losing their minds about ChatGPT is doing it wrong, we just asked it to write a song in the style of Tom Waits about meat and it was perfect

[sh🏔️ne @ashaneintheass]

I refuse to live in a world where quixotic is not pronounced “kee-ah-tic”

[sh🏔️ne @ashaneintheass]

I didn’t know that “irreverent” meant something other that “fun and silly” until last week. I thought it meant “lighthearted comedy.” I never went to guilt church.

[sh🏔️ne @ashaneintheass]

New theory: “you get more conservative as you get older” is simply derived from the fact that you’re noisier when you move. Things crack, joints pop, you mutter “ouch.” It becomes more difficult to share space if people can’t be quiet. Snap crackle pop, you old resentful man.

[sh🏔️ne @ashaneintheass]

I’m supposed to go to Humboldt in 2.5 weeks but it looks like it might rain the whole time. If you did an impulse Southern CA desert trip where you could park a 25 ft camper for free, where would you go?

[sh🏔️ne @ashaneintheass]

Child: “so what’s the difference between farro and rice and all the other ones?”
Me: “… all the other ones?”
Child: “Yeah the other ones”
Me: “The other… grains?”
Barley and Oats: “oh ok I see, we’re ‘the other ones,’ real nice 😒”

[sh🏔️ne @ashaneintheass]

As sleazy rip-off guys go, used car salesmen really don’t hold a candle to Craigslist Firewood Guys

[sh🏔️ne @ashaneintheass]

@HaffaAlan I’m in grad school! Only one more year ☺️

[sh🏔️ne @ashaneintheass]

Whenever I get fed up with or discouraged about school I just count the number of months until I never have to use a citation style EVER AGAIN and can just write stuff and have people trust me that I’m not full of shit

[sh🏔️ne @ashaneintheass]

@TheRegencyCook Yes.

However, the absolutely freaks out there who eat it (especially nonfat!) with pineapple or some sweet what-have-you are monsters. Cottage cheese (only and ever full fat) is appropriately enjoyed for breakfast with halved cherry tomatoes, s&p, and hot sauce.

[sh🏔️ne @ashaneintheass]

@murderxbryan Pretty scammy, just find a meat market that sells prime at a decent price per lb instead if you want a good steak.

[sh🏔️ne @ashaneintheass]

Hot take: theme/amusement parks are not parks. Parks are inexpensive or free places to get outside, have a picnic, camp, fish, hike, enjoy and protect nature and wildlife. Theme/amusement parks should be called Amusement Resorts instead. They’re an insult to parks.

[sh🏔️ne @ashaneintheass]

I absolutely hate getting up and eating a healthy breakfast and taking a walk and like, taking care of myself: 0/10. Would absolutely rather drink cheap champagne in bed all morning. To whom does this come naturally? Fuck em.

[sh🏔️ne @ashaneintheass]

My kid is making pancakes from scratch and I’m having hot sauce sardines on crackers for breakfast like a goblin

[sh🏔️ne @ashaneintheass]

Old Dads at the holidays really be moralizing about “what time the day OUGHT to start” and waking up at 5 am only to fall asleep on the couch all afternoon when the rest of the family is conscious and trying to play a board game.

[sh🏔️ne @ashaneintheass]

I totally though John Goodman committed suicide by drowning but apparently that just happened to his character in Treme

[sh🏔️ne @ashaneintheass]

Just saw the guy who played Ron Weasley all grown up in Cabinet of Curiosities and he looks like a McPoyle