Ash Rettich

The future is female.

[Ash Rettich @ashleyrettich]

So my aunt gave me this Dora the Explorer hula skirt as a gift thinking it would genuinely fit me..

[Ash Rettich @ashleyrettich]

👀👀

[Lockheed Martin @LockheedMartin]

We were proud to welcome @RepMikeRogersAL to our Troy, Alabama, facility to see the critical work strengthening America’s Arsenal of Freedom.

We’re scaling production, investing in our workforce and expanding manufacturing capacity to deliver for our nation and allies. 🇺🇸

[Christopher Rettich @crettich]

I’m glad @ashleyrettich could join me in reliving my college years, showing up to a party at 11:30 pm. #NYE2023 #NewYearsEve

[Ash Rettich @ashleyrettich]

Me: I really wish I had this Olivia Rodrigo album when I was young and going through heart break

Universe: What’s that? You want the biggest heart break of your entire life so you can relate to these songs?

Me: wait no…

Universe: COMING RIGHT UP!

[ʕ •ᴥ•ʔ @levenvaneenster]

me watching the last 2 episodes of every season of never have I ever

[Ash Rettich @ashleyrettich]

Worked my day off today. Ripped my pants. Happy Friday.

[Ash Rettich @ashleyrettich]

If someone at work asks you if you are pregnant and you are not, you should automatically get the rest of the day off with pay. No questions asked.

[Ash Rettich @ashleyrettich]

question of the day is:

will I get fired for cutting my work shirt into a crop top so my shamrock tattoo shows?

[Ash Rettich @ashleyrettich]

Being in charge of the volume while watching Harry Potter is a full time job.

[Spencer @realspencerpalm]

@ashleyrettich did you look like this

[Ash Rettich @ashleyrettich]

@realspencerpalm Oh my gosh how’d you get this picture of me!?

[Ash Rettich @ashleyrettich]

Why can’t an hour at work go by as fast as an hour when I’m hitting snooze in the morning?

[Ash Rettich @ashleyrettich]

I truly don’t mind wearing a mask, but I have had more cystic acne on my chin in the past 11 months than I have in my entire life.

[Ash Rettich @ashleyrettich]

To sum up my last two weeks spent in quarantine......

[Ash Rettich @ashleyrettich]

I can name very few more uncomfortable things than when your foot touches the nail technician’s boob during a pedicure.

[Ash Rettich @ashleyrettich]

It’s 60 degrees out and I turned on the heat in my car..... I’ve been away from home for far too long.

[Ash Rettich @ashleyrettich]

Is it weird that my biggest fear about my house being unlocked while they build it is that a hobo will come in and poop in my living room?

[Ash Rettich @ashleyrettich]

@mindykaling I demand more Never Have I Ever. Please send new episodes ASAP. ❤️❤️❤️

[Ash Rettich @ashleyrettich]

@raachrene

[Ash Rettich @ashleyrettich]

The thing about sunscreen is... literally no one has ever regretted putting too much on.

[Ash Rettich @ashleyrettich]

How’d they find this picture of me trying on my new bathing suits today?