ned schneebly

former horse girl // current corporate sellout // future ghost

[ned schneebly @askidmore_]

"I fucking love quesadillas" -@JoshMirabella

[NOBUNAGA🇯🇵🏯_夏樹蒼依 @japan_nobunaga]

USA. A Mexican restaurant. We had not yet ordered anything, and the food was already arriving.

Chips. Salsa. Unrequested. Free.

I stopped the waiter. "We have not earned these."

"They just come with the table, man."

They come with the TABLE. In my land, hospitality is a debt. Every gift creates an obligation, weighed carefully, returned in the proper season with interest of feeling. Here, the gift arrives before you have even proven you can pay for dinner.

This is not an appetizer. This is a declaration: we trust you. Eat.

I ate with the gravity the moment deserved. And then — I must report this calmly — the basket emptied, and a new one appeared.

"Did we…?"

"Refill," the waiter said. "It's bottomless."

Bottomless. They have wells of salsa. The supply lines of this nation are beyond anything my ancestors imagined.

My friend warned me. "Don't fill up on chips, dude."

Too late. I had accepted three baskets. Honor demanded each one be finished — an unfinished gift is an insult. By the time my actual food arrived, I was a ruined man.

I was not hungry. I was not comfortable. I had been defeated by a courtesy.

Generosity that arrives before the request cannot be repaid. It can only be survived.

I know the rule now. I have made my peace with the basket. One basket. Two at the most.

Who am I deceiving. There is no number of baskets I would refuse. The trust of a nation is in that salsa, and I intend to honor all of it.

[ned schneebly @askidmore_]

GIVE HER A PIGGYBACK RIDE YOURE 6FOOT8

[ned schneebly @askidmore_]

@FrankyPatterns @AzPetrich did this take fall out of your ass

[Jonathan 'Boo and Vote' Cohn @JonathanCohn]

The news is all terrible, but the Post Office’s new baby wild animals stamps are good.

[ned schneebly @askidmore_]

together, we can replace every gun in america with a living alligator

[moons @moonsandhues]

my life continuously improves as I age. i hope to be a wizardly old man in a beautiful sunlit home in the forest with some animals one day.

[Neil Stone @DrNeilStone]

The HPV vaccine is eliminating cervical cancer, yes

[Witch @Space_Bunzzz]

Back in my day there was so much toilet paper and so much eggs that we gathered at night and threw them at the houses of our enemies.

[ned schneebly @askidmore_]

@FamousSally_ girl: RUGS!!!!!!

[mir 𖦹⊹ ࣪ ﹏﹏𓂁﹏⊹ ࣪ @itsonlymir]

idk who needed to hear this but in about 35 days the sun will start setting at 7pm

[aster 🌟 @pastelstarstuff]

“americans don’t understand how bad this is-“ SHUT UP SHUT UP YES I DO AND IM SCARED!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Matthew Chapman @fawfulfan]

This is absolutely insane.

If scientists aren't allowed to use the term "women" or "female" when applying for NSF grants, that basically rules out any human clinical trials of anything.

"Disability" is blacklisted too? There goes a lot of medical research.

[Well, who did you expect? #COYS @BreezerGalway]

1/5

I've no words. This is truly devastating:

'“All of the data for HIV is gone. Normally there’s a menu for medical professionals,” but that has disappeared, says Angela Rasmussen, a virologist at the University of Saskatchewan who says she was up until 2 a.m.

[Alex Press @alexnpress]

having a kitten is going well

[ned schneebly @askidmore_]

other countries watching to the states trust the opinions of convicted felons and groundhogs

[ned schneebly @askidmore_]

SHAKIRA

[ned schneebly @askidmore_]

SHAMMY SHAKE IS BACK ON THE MENU BOYS!!!!!!!!!!!