Annie Tuttle

[Miley Official @MileyCyrusBz]

250 years ago today, Miley Cyrus founded the United States Of America just so she could party (July 4, 1776).

[That's My Michelle @JamelleMyBelle]

Somebody said that World Cup is just the US having a giant sleepover with the cousins we never see because our parents hate each other. 😂

[Papii🥤 @ammalusty]

Why would I drive 10 minutes to pick up dinner when I can stay seated and have it delivered slightly cold for only $38 more

[nice young man @dylmichaelc]

can i send you 14 non urgent consecutive texts in a row at 2:44 am

[latke @latkedelrey]

i feel like stu in rugrats when his wife is like why are you making pudding at 3am and he’s like because i’ve lost control of my life

[Buck @Buck36043Buck]

Do you wanna Come over and get Irritated with my Behavior

[Papii🥤 @ammalusty]

formal apology to my parents for my behavior during the 2008 recession. if someone asked me to buy them a nintendo ds and an annual roblox membership rn i'd actually blow up

[talia @taliasbonnin]

Put me unmedicated in a room with RFK Jr. for 30 mins and he’ll come out saying we need Lexapro in the drinking water

[SwiftieLee 🖤 @SwiftieLee1]

Being 28 is so weird because you feel like you’re 23 but then you meet someone who’s 23 and realize what 5 years does for you.

[nile @nileandah]

this is my version of an egot

[Miley Official @MileyCyrusBz]

🚨 HANNAH MONTANA PERFORMS BEST OF BOTH WORLDS. INSANE.

[lily @c0wgirlonline]

ok

[Hustlanani @hustlanani]

Sorry I can’t come my clothes look stupid on me

[mo :3 @fruitpibble]

and for the lady, perhaps a gun?

[Ada 𝜗𝜚˚⋆ @YPZBYDJCMKatyaa]

we used to be a proper country

[Jeff Sunday @TheDegenWeekly]

Courtside at Waffle House

[soggy broccoli @soggybrocoli]

the inner child in me is open mouth coughing on the inner child in you

[🤠 @heavensbvnny]

No babe your 10 minute incremental alarms starting a full hour before you actually get up only make me love you more

[Trixie Mattel™ @trixiemattel]

That stage of grief where you start dressing like Katya!