audrazepam

iridescent • I’m just a silly little guy

[audrazepam @audrey_pixel]

Photo dump thread with my blue ass eyebrows bc I’m hot

[audrazepam @audrey_pixel]

My husband is so used to me slugging my face every night that he gets uncomfortable when I go to bed and my face is not slippery as fuck

[audrazepam @audrey_pixel]

My hair is officially “awkward claw clip bun” length

[Vic @VictorPopeJr]

People who wear glasses why y’all just don’t get lasik? Besides the price of course. If u just ain’t got the bread then I feel u don’t answer

[audrazepam @audrey_pixel]

@countcockulaaa This but my body dysmorphia is pretty localized to my face. I have no idea what I look like most of the time and I also heavily focus on flaws no one else would notice. I have to remind myself that I look like Audrey and this is exactly what Audrey looks like. ❤️

[audrazepam @audrey_pixel]

Forgot to mention earlier I did 30 minutes of speed walking uphill on the treadmill this morning but then I puked immediately afterwards

[audrazepam @audrey_pixel]

Okay so this hair dryer was literally like $15 I don’t see the appeal in buying $100+ ones but I want an expensive one to compare lmao

[audrazepam @audrey_pixel]

@Deyjwon Im not even surprised anymore

[audrazepam @audrey_pixel]

Apparently this is pretty much exactly how they fold socks in the military but I made one extra step by putting them inside of each other lmao. I thought I made it up 😭

[audrazepam @audrey_pixel]

Am I crazy?

[audrazepam @audrey_pixel]

@rachelmillman As someone with a stimulant dependency this seems pretty cost effective

[audrazepam @audrey_pixel]

—SECRETSOFALCHEMYCALCULATEEVERYTHINGREINCARNATECROWLEY-f̶̬̉u̶̧͗c̴̢͒ḵ̴̈ ̴̢͐ţ̵͘ḥ̴́e̵̟͊ ̴̯̚f̴̦̕ȁ̸̯m̷͍̌e̷̞̚,̷̠̌ ̷̲̕f̴͍͝u̸͌͜c̴̼̓k̸̙̂ ̸̭̀t̵̪̊h̶̀ͅë̸͚́ ̸̹̑d̸̻̓r̴͕̿u̴̡͐g̷̲̽ś̷̹,̷͇͝ ̴͉̂I̸̤̎’̷̧̓m̵̖̄ ̷̝͆ó̸͉n̶̤̓ ̷͎͗c̷̢͗l̶̺̽o̶̞̎u̶̝͌d̴̫̊ ̸̞͋n̶̓ͅi̵̟̊n̸̺͂ę̴̈́ —”

“Get out of my house”

[audrazepam @audrey_pixel]

Someone: “do you have any special talents?”
Me: “THROWANOTHERONEUPINTHEGRAVEIDONTNEEDANAKPUTADOUBLESIDEDBLADEINTHEMAINVEINWATCHINGYOULEAKLIKEABROKENPIPEIMTHESOFTSPOKENTYPEBUTWHENIHANDLETHEARCHETYPEICANNOTSPEAKONLYDIGDEEPINTOABYSMALDEPRESSIONTOFINDWHATICANNOTUNSEEIMAFIENDFORTHE—

[audrazepam @audrey_pixel]

3 Stacks bodied this song so hard they gave him 2 long ass verses to bookend it 🔥

[audrazepam @audrey_pixel]

@anderson_cooter Omg I love him?????

[audrazepam @audrey_pixel]

Stop infantilizing me and trying to undermine everything I’m fucking DOING

[audrazepam @audrey_pixel]

My mom: *taking the shoes out of the dryer that I was drying because I have to leave this morning and putting her stuff in there”
Me: “can you not do that they obviously weren’t done and I am on a time constraint this morning”
Mom: *obviously dissatisfied grumbling*

[audrazepam @audrey_pixel]

Me: “god I’m so glad I’m moving away from here I can’t stand this, and no one has even told me they’re going to miss me. I’m not going to miss you either then.”
Mom: “well you always act like you hate us 🥺”

Fucks sake I wonder why

[audrazepam @audrey_pixel]

Omg good for her I love this 🥹❤️ when I lose weight and some comes off of my breasts I feel so much more confident to wear what I want without it being absurdly obscene

[, @Zvbear]

This is the worst thing I ever seen in my entire life

[audrazepam @audrey_pixel]

@countcockulaaa I want one or two of those so bad lmao