Matt McVicker

Nashville.

[Matt McVicker @augustusempire]

"Like, if I was thinking about it... I would have thought about it." - @brigidkatla

[Matt McVicker @augustusempire]

@chelsealshannon Touché. Even still, I eat those with my fingers.

[Matt McVicker @augustusempire]

I have yet to find a situation in which a spork has made my life better.

[Matt McVicker @augustusempire]

@CLNTDNL it's my middle name. Thought I'd go with the classic white girl formula for an IG name

[Matt McVicker @augustusempire]

If only I could smoke cigars at work. And get tattooed. Or just not be work and smoke a cigar while getting tattooed.

[Matt McVicker @augustusempire]

Are pedophiles allowed to eat Sour Patch Kids?

[Matt McVicker @augustusempire]

Tax scams are fun. Having to listen to coworkers almost fall for them is more fun.

[Matt McVicker @augustusempire]

"Tofu is absent of flavor, just like white people." - my Native American coworker

[Matt McVicker @augustusempire]

Jet fuel doesn't burn steel, so 9/11 had to be an inside job.

[Matt McVicker @augustusempire]

I'm going to put potholes in the TDOT offices and see how they feel about it.

[Matt McVicker @augustusempire]

I'm not a pizzaman. I'm a pizza, man.

[Matt McVicker @augustusempire]

Really glad that the Sharks from the halftime show are getting more attention then potential Illuminati involvement.

[Matt McVicker @augustusempire]

April showers bring May showers.

[Matt McVicker @augustusempire]

The 10th anniversary of the release of Mean Girls is Wednesday. And on Wednesdays, we wear pink.

[Matt McVicker @augustusempire]

I'm just a man.

[Matt McVicker @augustusempire]

Being failure conscious leads to failure.

[Matt McVicker @augustusempire]

Finally starting a day right!

[Matt McVicker @augustusempire]

Don't count the days, make the days count.

[Matt McVicker @augustusempire]

I'm not just a number.

[Matt McVicker @augustusempire]

On that flight grind again. Can't wait to be back in Nashville!