moonstoned🌚

phd in vibe science, market basket loyalist, elon musk hate account

[lily @lil_mermaid]

i hate when i think a guy is hot who everyone else also thinks is hot. it’s like ok well i guess you got me too…. fucker

[moonstoned🌚 @auntiezing]

one day you’re young, the next you’re 30 and your husband is installing a heated toilet seat/warm water bidet combo as one of your christmas presents

[moonstoned🌚 @auntiezing]

crying thinking about how someday my 2 year old might go to her partner’s family’s for Thanksgiving…

[moonstoned🌚 @auntiezing]

protein cold foam?? how about I get a GUN

[bt @b__________t]

do vintage designer stores deliberately buy things in sizes that only toddlers can fit or does everyone just hate me specifically

[moonstoned🌚 @auntiezing]

TRUST that in the year of our lord 2025, you do NOT need to be making your pet an instagram account. when it comes up in my recommended accounts I will not be following. please stop, I’m BEGGING.

[moonstoned🌚 @auntiezing]

got to be the one to break the taylor swift news to the office

[jon repetti @pourfairelevide]

don’t know how to explain this, but “hot honey” is the pickleball of condiments (derogatory)

[moonstoned🌚 @auntiezing]

@neepynoop and that can be soooo beautiful for a woman!

[DA VINKI @VorosTwins]

“i asked chatgpt” “i asked grok” well we asked the Da Vinki Twins and they said Da Vinki

[moonstoned🌚 @auntiezing]

one thing no one tells you about being a parent is that you WILL encounter some WEIRD ASS children at the playground

[moonstoned🌚 @auntiezing]

@notwurms NEW TWITTER PIC JUST DROPPED #pocketsizedandy

[moonstoned🌚 @auntiezing]

and now i’m scrolling zillow in bed with the fan on and windows open listening to the birds & wind!!!!! life can be so beautiful

[moonstoned🌚 @auntiezing]

having a perfect day! woke up early & lounged in bed, had quick scrambled eggs & toast before I heading to a vinyasa class. got an iced latte & came home to toddler snuggles, went to an antique store & estate sale and grabbed lunch at market basket as a fam. now baby is napping!

[horse dentist @equine__dentist]

the only flag i salute

[kiery @kierymf]

On the aux playing 528 hz

[moonstoned🌚 @auntiezing]

just rage vacuumed my car at the free vacuums at the car wash and ate scalloped potatoes and i’m feeling better x

[moonstoned🌚 @auntiezing]

me all weekend long, why can I not shake my bad mood