Jonny Hawkins

Writer, Actor & Purveyor of fine disco

[Jonny Hawkins @auntyjonny]

I’m a gay, dyslexic, with narcolepsy, asthma, one lung and, more recently, Diarrhea . I’ll park where I want to.

[Jonny Hawkins @auntyjonny]

@Brocklesnitch Would

[Jonny Hawkins @auntyjonny]

@Brocklesnitch It’s the best Kate Ceberano song. For sure.

[Jonny Hawkins @auntyjonny]

IKEA is MacDonalds for seats.

[Jonny Hawkins @auntyjonny]

New drag name: Demandy Moore, and she wants everything

[Jonny Hawkins @auntyjonny]

Just once in my life, I’d like to go on a group holiday where single people are given the nice rooms and the couples have to sleep on the pull outs and blow up mattresses. Just once.

[Jonny Hawkins @auntyjonny]

There should be a button you can press that reminds couples you’re eating with that their bickering doesn’t count as conversation, and that no one cares if it was 4 or 12 apples in the fruit bowl. No one cares.

[Assembly Festival @AssemblyFest]

✨Are you ready for it?✨

These amazing acts are definitely in their Swiftie Era!

🎟⬇️
https://t.co/O7bBzUl4Rq

[Jonny Hawkins @auntyjonny]

All brim, no hat.

[Jonny Hawkins @auntyjonny]

@Barrel_lord That’s crook

[Jonny Hawkins @auntyjonny]

@Brocklesnitch That party was a trick

[Jonny Hawkins @auntyjonny]

I only seem like a gay man. Really I’m a lesbian who’s sexually attracted to men.

[Jonny Hawkins @auntyjonny]

“It’s none of ya business” is my slogan for 2024.

[Jonny Hawkins @auntyjonny]

When someone in a group makes a joke that isn’t funny, so no one laughs, the conversation keeps moving, but they think no one heard it, so they try again, but this time round it causes a silence, and everyone involved, and I mean everyone, in that pause, prays for a swift death.

[Jonny Hawkins @auntyjonny]

Seventh Heaven was such a weird show about horny christians keeping a lid on it.

[Ultima @UltimaShadowX]

There was nothing more beautiful than a group of strangers coming together to produce this entire cinematic storyline:

[Jonny Hawkins @auntyjonny]

If your Mardi Gras party isn’t 60 percent lesbian, I’m not coming.

[Jonny Hawkins @auntyjonny]

People who take themselves seriously doing misguided things v. seriously is my favourite. Because no one wants to tell them how bad their choices are.

[Jonny Hawkins @auntyjonny]

Gen Z girlies keep mistaking for a gay man who can talk like them.

Picture my mouth agog as she steamrolled through a million internet references I could not possibly understand.

[Jonny Hawkins @auntyjonny]

Mean Hot Gurl drag has got to go.

[Jonny Hawkins @auntyjonny]

@Barrel_lord I feel like you want to be the only thicc queer B-Boy in Newtown