Auston Green

Twitter is where I go when I’ve had enough💕💖

[Auston Green @austongreen]

the transitions
are getting outta hand.

am I talking about influencers,
or am I talking about genders?

u’ll never know.

[Auston Green @austongreen]

women have double standards for men too
u get accused of
being overprotective if u don't like
ur influencer girlfriend postin thirst traps
but if u'r okay with it,
u get accused of sluttin her out
for motorcycle money
& I'm like
"u think THAT’S pimp shit
I'LL SHOW U PIMP SHIT!"

[Auston Green @austongreen]

white people gotta be
more like white chocolate

not just the local legend
that earned the nickname,
but also how actual
white chocolate plays the supportive,
peripheral role
in the snackers’ arena

[Auston Green @austongreen]

no one talks about
the large amounts offered to women
who aren’t sex workers
this woman is not selling
what u are asking for
yet u still offer her an amount of money that
could feed & put a roof over
several peoples heads
it’s a disgusting attempt of exploiting gender inequality

[Auston Green @austongreen]

meateaters are home wreckers

home wreckers without the
hot, dangerous,
well-needed sex

jus breaking up families
stuffin ur face with flesh

[Auston Green @austongreen]

we should
start calling food “bood”

“yea just gonna go get some bood”

[Auston Green @austongreen]

she prolly won’t tell u,
but I’ll fuckin tell ya,
me & my high school partner
INVENTED the Airtag
we called it the “Pager Saver”
that was TWENTY YEARS ago
and now u’r all on our dicks
not losing ur shit anymore

[Auston Green @austongreen]

these kids are gonna go to Europe,
see “pomodoro” on the menu,
and get fuckin flashbacks

[Auston Green @austongreen]

how can you understand intuition
when I don't even understand it?

dead as that damn horse

[Auston Green @austongreen]

you might think
you’re not into feet
but you
jus haven’t seen the right feet

[Auston Green @austongreen]

she chuckled when
I was a little shy of 8 inches
but she was HUMBLED
by how I use it

quivering and grateful

[Auston Green @austongreen]

whenever someone criticizes
Gen-Z or Gen-A
for not having a “work ethic”,
just ask them about
their shitty leadership.
Look at ur life,
how is that in any way inspiring
or motivational??

[Auston Green @austongreen]

hear me out…

live action
Lady & the Tramp
but the dogs are actual people

so
a homeless man waits outside of
an Italian restaurant
to ask for a plate of spaghetti
for him and his girlfriend

maybe this is EXACTLY what
the world needs to see

but maybe not

[Auston Green @austongreen]

I feel like
training A.I. to figure out your "business solutions"
without the riff raff
from the peasants is giving
royals forcing the princess to
have grandkids with her brother,
we've already seen what happens

[Auston Green @austongreen]

if they’re not pedos,
they’re racist.
if they’re not racist,
they’re morally bankrupt.

being cruel, insensitive,
& out of touch isn’t good for business
or a country in the long run,
it’s not sustainable.
so we just need to keep picking it apart
until it falls apart

[Auston Green @austongreen]

why big pharma families
who created wealth
off of getting people addicted to legal opioids
didn’t use that money
to buy studio time to tell their story
like rappers in the ghetto did..?

why not tell any story of wealth?

why not tell the world why you stepped over those bodies?

[Auston Green @austongreen]

what if there’s a sweetheart at
the helm of the Buldak empire..? like
how u that sweet AND spicy
at the same time??

[Auston Green @austongreen]

garlic & bass are the same thing

[Auston Green @austongreen]

lady said she was fortunate to
do make-up w/someone on their
gender-affirming journey
sayin she felt like a big sis
its incredibly sweet & everything
but if I let a trans man in
on MY trade secrets
I'll create a fuckin DOG!
RUFF! RUFF!
a dog that needs to be neutered
or PUT DOWN!

[Auston Green @austongreen]

I noticed
my socials algorithm has been
sending me angrier activism posts

but as long as my porn algorithm doesn’t
start sending me angrier stuff …I SHOULD be okay