Funny Tweets

Funny, Love, Relationship, and Hilarious Tweets!!!
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[Funny Tweets @autocorrectes]

I’m not anti-social, most people just suck.

[Funny Tweets @autocorrectes]

Unsolved Mystery: Mr.Krabs + ? = Pearl the whale

[Funny Tweets @autocorrectes]

Nothing says "I'm a fatass" like wearing a T-shirt in a swimming pool.

[Funny Tweets @autocorrectes]

"I came. I saw. I conquered." Meh... I like my version better: I saw her. I conquered her. I came.

[Funny Tweets @autocorrectes]

Scroll fast and it's and its purple!!!

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[Goon Squad @goonsquad771]

When life's to hard to stand. Kneel

[Goon Squad @goonsquad771]

RT if you are a CHRISTIAN!!!

[Funny Tweets @autocorrectes]

Its funny how the person who says they have your back will be the same person that stabs you in it.

[Funny Tweets @autocorrectes]

There's a difference between being funny and being annoying.

[Funny Tweets @autocorrectes]

Mom. Mom. Mom. Mom. Mom. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mama. Mama. Mama. Mama. Mama. Mother. Mother. Mother. Mother. Mom: What?!? Me: Hi

[Funny Tweets @autocorrectes]

Raisin cookies that look like chocolate chip cookies are the main reason i have trust issues.

[Funny Tweets @autocorrectes]

"Text me if you want." Means "I want you to text me."

[Funny Tweets @autocorrectes]

You compliment your friend on their mustache and suddenly she won't talk to you. WTF

[Funny Tweets @autocorrectes]

Once you go asian, you never miss an equation ;)

[Funny Tweets @autocorrectes]

Mom, my friends don't care if my room's clean.. they just care if we have food.

[Funny Tweets @autocorrectes]

What did the ocean say to the other ocean?... Nothing they just waved... Did you Sea what I did there?...I'm shore you did, BEACH.

[Funny Tweets @autocorrectes]

When you start to hate someone , everything they do begins to annoy you ... Them: *Cough* You: "OOOOHHH MY GODDDDDDD!

[Funny Tweets @autocorrectes]

I hate it when my cookie becomes suicidal and decides to drown itself at the bottom of my milk.

[Funny Tweets @autocorrectes]

When you put your leg out of your blanket because your hot, and then getting scared because you feel exposed to monsters!

[Funny Tweets @autocorrectes]

*When Mom starts counting to 3* Mom: 1! Me: Do u really think counting will make me do anything? Mom: 2! Me: Oh sh*t! I'm going, i'm going!