Anita Hanjöb

Former Heavy Weight Champion of Western America.

[Anita Hanjöb @avaklanche]

@meltborne KC didn’t look amused either

[Anita Hanjöb @avaklanche]

@PressSec No one is gunna play with your kids on the playground. Partner with them on projects. Be their actual friend. Not unless they’re incentivized to. And that’ll be because of you.

[Anita Hanjöb @avaklanche]

Me talking about myself

[mia🫧 @mia11112233]

recently befriended a hideously ugly and disgusting looking freak and it’s very surreal to experience how people are kind of rude to her

[Anita Hanjöb @avaklanche]

@NotAUSAirport @AUStinAirport @cool_chic2 Drink my blood

[Anita Hanjöb @avaklanche]

@AUStinAirport @cool_chic2 How early should we get to the airport? I have a flight at 3:30pm

[Anita Hanjöb @avaklanche]

@h5344582 @astoundconnects Automated service just now told me 3:30…

[Anita Hanjöb @avaklanche]

@astoundconnects Internet down in 78722.

[Anita Hanjöb @avaklanche]

There’s something about seeing someone use a glass bottle in a pool that makes me wanna use a slur

[෴ @rhagertha]

every single moment this motherfucker showed up on our screens like

[Anita Hanjöb @avaklanche]

leaf blowers accomplish the tasks of 1. ineffectively cleaning your yard of unwanted leaves and 2. effectively torpedoing my mood with such ferocity that usually only @peacock and @NBCSports can do

[Anita Hanjöb @avaklanche]

Day 2 of no caffeine or booze. Also day 2 of being a mega bitch.

[Anita Hanjöb @avaklanche]

If literally *everything else* about me wasn’t even evidence I’m unwell, there’s also the account names I pick for my belongings.

[Anita Hanjöb @avaklanche]

I love getting emails from my cat’s vet that are addressed to “Frank Lynch.” Like he’s an boomer accountant and not a cat with anxiety.

[Anita Hanjöb @avaklanche]

@BR0IG @MukkysWorld This is a workaround like instead of stabbing someone you shoot them

[Anita Hanjöb @avaklanche]

“Gosh, I haven’t had any booze in a week,” I remark proudly as I take my nightly 30mg edible.

[Anita Hanjöb @avaklanche]

@TraumaN4mdWitch @hellolanemoore Fuck yeah. I’ve been eating potato egg breakfast tacos for like 20 years

[Anita Hanjöb @avaklanche]

"Who keeps moving the scissors?!" I shout in an apartment I solely occupy.

[Anita Hanjöb @avaklanche]

@netflix I skipped out on a free dinner to watch this live reunion but I guess I’m still getting fucked #LoveIsBlind