deejay 💙

🏳️‍⚧️ she/her when a child is loved at home, they come to twitter ready to learn. if not loved at home, they come to twitter to be loved. here i am

[deejay 💙 @avatardeejay]

it gets so gay the second i open twitter

[a @aallleeexxxxxx1]

“nothing special to see” and its the most special thing ive ever seen 🙄

[NOBUNAGA🇯🇵🏯_夏樹蒼依 @japan_nobunaga]

I mentioned that my garage door was making a sound.

An American immediately said, "I got a guy."

He did not ask what the sound was. He did not ask what kind of door. He produced a guy on the basis of the word garage.

I asked who the guy was.

He said, "Just a guy."

He did not have a company name. He had a first name and a phone number in his phone saved as "Mike Garage."

That is the contact name. Mike Garage. As though Garage is his surname. As though there is a family.

I asked how he found this guy.

"My brother-in-law used him."

I asked if the brother-in-law was satisfied.

He thought about it. Then he said, "He's still standing."

The house is still standing. That is the entire review.

Inside I said: THEY DO NOT KEEP RECORDS. THEY KEEP LOYALTIES.

I called Mike Garage. He answered from inside a vehicle. There was wind. He said he could come Tuesday between eleven and four.

Between eleven and four. A window of five hours. In my country this would be a scandal. Here it is generous. He gave me a window at all. Some guys do not give you a window. Some guys say "Tuesday" and that is the whole appointment.

He came at 1:40.

He fixed it in twenty minutes. He charged me less than I expected and he did not take a card, only cash or an app I had never heard of.

Before leaving he looked at my water heater, which I had not mentioned, and said, "That's gonna go."

I asked when.

"Couple years."

I asked what I should do.

He said, "I'll give you a guy."

He gave me a guy. Mike Garage has a guy. The guy has a guy. There is a network beneath this country made entirely of men named after their function, and none of them advertise, and all of them are busy.

Inside I said: THERE IS A SECOND NATION HERE. IT HAS NO SIGNS. IT IS ENTERED ONLY BY INTRODUCTION.

I have been given four guys since.

I have a guy for trees.

I did not know I needed a guy for trees.

I have trees now, apparently. They are my responsibility. A man named Rick told me so and then left.

[Callum Stephen (He/Him) @AutisticCallum_]

The autistic urge to not register red flags as red flags because you’re so used to people misinterpreting your harmless behaviours and you don’t want to do that to anyone else, so you go *overboard* trying to find acceptable explanations for other people’s unacceptable behaviour.

[deejay 💙 @avatardeejay]

@Beardandcamera @scrotesonfire a little demonstration of brian’s point for the class, very nice

[deejay 💙 @avatardeejay]

@6160MJ @dittyel me too. thank you

[bONGO 🌐 @wariocolosseum]

wiping meta off the face of the planet is strictly a net positive for humanity

[💖💫🐰🌸🐰💫💖 // WORKING ON COMMS @BUNKlNS]

like PLEASE unmute this it will honestly make your day

[Klara @klara_sjo]

Imagine some 4D baddie doing this to your balls.

[Krista Diamond @KristaDiamond]

I cry every time I read the two-headed calf poem, and I mean EVERY time

[deejay 💙 @avatardeejay]

@VladTheInflator @MaddiMays Grok sounds exhausted

[lauren @olquartertank]

i honest to god tee-heed at this

[jack @14YoureOver]

13s tardis is so beautiful i will never understand the hate

[𝓔𝓶 ♡ @emkenobi]

Someone spent thousands of dollars to get this shit made btw.

[Cube @KiwamiCube]

A second 9/11 has hit the Doctor Who fandom

[Fav @Favwontmiss]

The neurodivergent urge to overexplain during a misunderstanding so nobody misunderstands you again only to accidentally create three brand-new misunderstandings in the process.