avmail

[avmail @avmail1]

@HunterBiden @schrockn hunter biden is the michael jordan of twitter, but also the lebron james of crack. its like what cant this man do.

[もふもふ動画 @tyomateee2]

初めて花火を見た猫、目がキラキラしてて可愛い

[avmail @avmail1]

@DDuggan21 I guess. But are there a lot of pro sports teams who try to get the small, weak, slow guys walking around?

[David Rattigan @davidmrattigan]

buying this and then dying immediately and forcing my descendants to finish building it over the next 100 years

[Robert Wilkinson @robertwlk]

40 years ago today, l asked my childhood sweetheart, my best friend and the most gorgeous woman l know to marry me.

All three said no.

[kira 👾 @kirawontmiss]

Before AI we had Zach King

[Hunter Biden @HunterBiden]

@Boilers32 It most definitely was not. I would never have forgotten my drugs.

[NOBUNAGA🇯🇵🏯_夏樹蒼依 @japan_nobunaga]

I ordered one pancake in America. The waitress wrote it down and said, "one short stack."

Short. I am a small and humble man. A short stack sounded perfect for me. I waited with a calm heart.

She returned carrying three pancakes, each the size of my face, stacked into a tower, with a block of butter on top sliding down the sides like slow lava.

This was the short one. I did not dare ask what the tall one looked like. Some knowledge a man is not ready for.

I ate for forty minutes. I was not full. I was afraid. The tower did not shrink. I am fairly sure it was growing back faster than I could eat it.

I had to surrender. I left half. In Japan, leaving food is a deep shame. So I leaned in close and apologized to the pancakes directly, in a low voice, one by one.

The waitress asked if I wanted a box. I did not know food could be taken into custody. I declined. I did not want it following me home.
In America, is the short stack truly the small one?
I need time to prepare my spirit before I ever face the tall one.

[NEXTA @nexta_tv]

We’ve all seen pigeons, but you probably had no idea what their chicks look like.

Now you do.

[SATOYU.OhioBoss @satoyu0704]

みんな本当はこう思ってるんでしょ？ #sigma

[7/11 Truther @DaveMcNamee3000]

We are very close to reaching the most American sentence ever made

[avmail @avmail1]

@SHO_aka_STIME いい日本を作って下さい

[eternal classic @eternalclassic_]

no country is safe from this

[しんがり @Gospelhouse8]

@tweet_tokyo_web ヒグマと違ってツキノワグマは木の実以外食べないから、熊被害に偽装した事件性も視野に入れて操作してほしいな。熊も人も冤罪は避けたい。

[Fight Club 🥊💨 @FIGHTZINCLUB]

O ChatGPT em 2050 procurando o cara que pediu pra ele avaliar a foto do cacete:

[God @TheTweetOfGod]

@rickygervais @AndrewGold_ok YES! I BEAT YOU, YOU SON OF A BITCH!

[Alan Saunders @ASaunders_PGH]

The Pittsburgh Zoo is clearly in win-now mode.

[Red Ketchup @redketchup69]

@magills_ Thats because i wasnt racist back then, and i am now

[Kenjac @JackKennedy]

We are dangerously close to him asking to meet General Tso

[Keifer @DannyVegito]

imagine freeing one slave in your entire life and it’s Hitler