Brooke

[Brooke @b_hubrich]

A song about fast food to the tune of Lou Bega called "combo number 5"

[Brooke @b_hubrich]

My show is on

[Brooke @b_hubrich]

“I’ve never seen anyone slow down to look at Halloween decorations after almost shitting themselves at a stop light” is something Mike just said to me

[Brooke @b_hubrich]

I know a paper towel hate to see me comin

[Brooke @b_hubrich]

Feminism is zipping up the back of a dress on a stranger in the dressing room next to you

[Emilee Honey 📚 @emhoneyreads]

Well, now I NEED to go paint some bricks to look like little books for my front garden

[Brooke @b_hubrich]

Nothing humbles you quite like dropping off your own stool sample to the doctor

[Brooke @b_hubrich]

The best part about JFK is you can catch a flight AND bird watch

[Brooke @b_hubrich]

You ever have a cold so bad you’re laid there staring at the ceiling thinking “god gives his toughest battles to his strongest soldiers”

[Brooke @b_hubrich]

*screaming*

[Brooke @b_hubrich]

Connections really gonna give me an aneurysm one day

[Brooke @b_hubrich]

Trying to soothe my 3am headache but this ice pack smells like frozen chicken nuggets and that’s also my fault

[Brooke @b_hubrich]

@AnnieSpretty I’ve never related to something more

[Brooke @b_hubrich]

We have a fridge full of food I could cook but I just told Mike it’s international women’s day and now we’re getting pizza #ally

[Brooke @b_hubrich]

My favorite thing about edibles is you’ll be like “I don’t feel anything” and then you do some dumb shit and then you’re like “wait a second..”

[Brooke @b_hubrich]

However it’s 3 am who am I to talk?

[Brooke @b_hubrich]

One thing about dogs is they will sleep when you sleep…cats do not understand this concept

[Brooke @b_hubrich]

Petition for each train car to have a sign telling you which way is the closest bathroom so I don’t walk the wrong way

[Brooke @b_hubrich]

For reference

[Brooke @b_hubrich]

During 4th of July in Poughkeepsie we play “shooting or fireworks?”…but during the holidays we play “house fire or Santa Clause?”

[Brooke @b_hubrich]

✅ Marked safe from having Drake in my 2023 Spotify Wrapped