bach

in sleepwalking mode...

[Joey Swoll @TheJoeySwoll]

39 minutes is better than NO minutes at all. 👊🏼

[bach @bachodi]

@Warlock_mohit @coolfunnytshirt I get your point

However this logic does not hold, Ravi is a Sanskrit word and it was introduced tens of centuries before both Hindi and English

[AshleY @Aku_700]

🚨 HORRIFYING: "HELP ME! PLEASE HELP ME! THEY ARE GOING TO RAPE ME!"

15-year-old British girl screams for help as two Muslim men drag her away to rape her in Leamington Spa park.

She recorded the entire attack on her phone.

The Muslim attackers were Afghan asylum seekers.

Lawyers warned: "If the footage is released, there would be riots across the country."

[bach @bachodi]

@Namami_Bharatam @nanditathhakur Gentlemen ? I think there is a lady in there as well

[Elon Musk @elonmusk]

Major problem

[Matt Couch @RealMattCouch]

😂😂😂

[Gabbar @GabbbarSingh]

Poor Abhishek Sharma & Ishan Kishan. Will face the wrath coz of their stupid league owners.

[Men's Humor @MensHumor]

Most of you are too young.

[Derek J. Grossman @DerekJGrossman]

An absolute masterpiece. Frame and hang it in a museum right now.

[Johns. @CricCrazyJohns]

INDIAN TEAM GIVING A GUARD OF HONOUR TO ALYSSA HEALY 🥹❤️

- Australian legend playing her final ODI.

[Dr Poornima 🇮🇳 @PoornimaNimo]

MEA : All Indian nationals who are able to leave are advised to depart Iran immediately by available commercial means by 2nd February.

Indians in Iran : Hum kyu jaye ??

MEA : All Indian nationals who are able to leave are advised to depart Iran immediately by available commercial means by 9th February.

Indians in Iran : Ruk naa, they will arrange a flight for us, when the first bomb falls.

MEA : All Indian nationals who are able to leave are advised to depart Iran immediately by available commercial means immediately.

Indians in Iran : "Modi, help us. We have no one to save us. We are citizens of India....."

MEA arranges rescue flights.

Indians at the airport : Refusing the proffered roses.
"The flight was so crowded. I wanted my own space."
"I didn't get any breakfast."
"What thank Modi ?? We were left at the airport. I had to arrange my own taxi."
"No comments!!"
"Only we know what we faced.....how can you trivialise our suffering."
"My dog is traumatised."

[bach @bachodi]

@LicypriyaK @Dj_Cynical Looks like a manufactured tweet with an objective to create a divide. I have never called our fellow NE folks as such and never heard anyone else doing it.
Are you bored of not having anything to outrage for ?

[Aravind @aravind]

Every foreigner who thinks of coming to India must watch this. This is how Indians will scam you.

[Dr. Sudhir Mehta @sudhirmehtapune]

One lot of #EKA Electric buses ready to leave for #Africa and another lot ready to go to #UP both from our #Pune plant .
#BharatKiEka #MakeInIndia

[Peter Girnus 🦅 @gothburz]

The company hired me to lead their "Agile Transformation."
I don't know what Agile means.
Nobody does.
That's why it works.

I make $425,000 a year.
To move sticky notes.
From left to right.
On a board.
The board is digital now.
The sticky notes cost $80,000 in Jira licenses.
Progress.

Day one, I said "we need to break down silos."
Everyone nodded.
Silos are bad.
I don't know why.
But destroying them is a career.
My career.

I introduced "squads."
Squads are teams.
But disrupted.
We disrupted the teams into teams.
Different names.
Same people.
Same problems.
But Agile problems now.
Agile problems are strategic.

A senior engineer asked what we're actually changing.
I said, "The mindset."
He asked what that means.
I said, "It's a journey."
He asked where we're going.
I said, "Toward agility."
He asked what agility means.
I pointed at the sticky notes.
They were moving left to right.
That's velocity.
We have velocity now.

The VP of Engineering said two-week sprints don't fit their work.
I said, "That's waterfall thinking."
Waterfall is bad.
Like silos.
I don't know what waterfall is.
But I know it's bad.
She stopped talking.
Waterfall accusations end conversations.

We had a retrospective.
In the retro, we discussed what went wrong.
Everything went wrong.
We put it on sticky notes.
Then we moved the sticky notes.
Into a column called "Parking Lot."
The Parking Lot is where problems go to die.
It's full.
We don't look at it.
That's agile.

Velocity is up 40%.
I defined velocity.
I also defined the points.
I also defined the stories.
We're crushing it.
At the things I made up.
To measure.
Ourselves.

The CEO asked for ROI.
I showed a chart.
The chart went up.
Charts should go up.
This one did.
I didn't label the Y-axis.
Nobody asked.
Leadership is confidence.

We do standups now.
Every day.
We stand.
For 45 minutes.
Standing is agile.
Sitting is waterfall.
My legs hurt.
But we're transforming.

The transformation is now "Phase 3."
Phase 1 was assessment.
Phase 2 was implementation.
Phase 3 is "continuous improvement."
Continuous means forever.
Forever means job security.
I'm very secure.

My contract was extended.
Three more years.
For "cultural impact."
The culture is confused.
But impacted.

Agile transformation isn't about being agile.
It's about transforming.
Continuously.
Toward more transformation.
The destination is the journey.
The journey is billable.

[bach @bachodi]

@rebel_notout @Manpunstar I don’t have a single person in my circles who has watched this

[bach @bachodi]

@plot_twistttt 16

[bach @bachodi]

@mufaddal_vohra Why are they in suit ? Sarees weren’t in fashion that day?

[sirhighbreed @sirhighbreed]

What difference does it make?

[bach @bachodi]

@paakittadnya This clip did not sound like an apology