Bad Dad Jokes

I'm a Dad and I tell bad jokes.

[Bad Dad Jokes @baddadjokes]

Apparently you can’t use “beef stew” as a password.
It’s not stroganoff.

#dadjokes #JokeOfTheDay

[Bad Dad Jokes @baddadjokes]

There are too many black stereotypes.

[Bad Dad Jokes @baddadjokes]

What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta #joketuesday

[Bad Dad Jokes @baddadjokes]

What do you get if you stand between two llamas? Llamanated. #dadjokes #jokeoftheday

[Bad Dad Jokes @baddadjokes]

Toasters were the first form of pop-up notifications. #dadjoke #jokeoftheday

[Bad Dad Jokes @baddadjokes]

They don't watch the flintstones in Dubai. But Abu Dhabi do. #badjoke #dadjoke #joke

[Bad Dad Jokes @baddadjokes]

RT @TheMime: ...

[Bad Dad Jokes @baddadjokes]

I just read a book about Stockholm syndrome. It was pretty bad at first, but by the end I liked it. #dadjokes #jokeoftheday

[Bad Dad Jokes @baddadjokes]

What did the buffalo say to his son as he left for college? Bison

[Bad Dad Jokes @baddadjokes]

Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? Its ok, he woke up.

[Bad Dad Jokes @baddadjokes]

I wear a stethoscope so that in a medical emergency I can teach people a valuable lesson about assumptions. #dadjokes #jokeoftheday

[Bad Dad Jokes @baddadjokes]

I just ate a frozen apple. Hardcore. #DadmirationDay #FathersDay #dadjokes #HappyFathersDay

[Bad Dad Jokes @baddadjokes]

The shovel was a ground-breaking invention.

[Bad Dad Jokes @baddadjokes]

I wear a stethoscope so that in a medical emergency I can teach people a valuable lesson about assumptions. #dadjokes #jokeoftheday

[Bad Dad Jokes @baddadjokes]

I've been addicted to cold turkey for 2 years. I keep telling people I'm trying to quit cold turkey but nobody is taking me seriously.

[Bad Dad Jokes @baddadjokes]

I used to have a job collecting leaves. I was raking it in. #dadjokes #jokeoftheday

[Bad Dad Jokes @baddadjokes]

Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? Because they're so good at it.

[Bad Dad Jokes @baddadjokes]

My dad always told me “don’t be quick to find faults”... Good man, terrible geologist. #BadJokeFriday #dadjokes

[Bad Dad Jokes @baddadjokes]

What do you call an elephant that doesn't matter? An irrelephant

[Bad Dad Jokes @baddadjokes]

A classic from who's line is it anyway. #whoslineisitanyway

[Bad Dad Jokes @baddadjokes]

[Interview] "What are your strengths?" Me: I fall in love easily. "Okay... what are your weaknesses?" Me:Those blue eyes of yours. #dadjokes