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Bad Dad Jokes
@baddadjokes
I'm a Dad and I tell bad jokes.
Joined March 2011
66
Following
56.9K
Followers
575
Posts
Pinned Tweet
Bad Dad Jokes
@baddadjokes
over 8 years ago
Apparently you can’t use “beef stew” as a password. It’s not stroganoff.
#dadjokes
#JokeOfTheDay
Bad Dad Jokes
@baddadjokes
almost 3 years ago
There are too many black stereotypes.
Bad Dad Jokes
@baddadjokes
almost 3 years ago
What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta
#joketuesday
Bad Dad Jokes
@baddadjokes
almost 3 years ago
What do you get if you stand between two llamas? Llamanated.
#dadjokes
#jokeoftheday
Who to follow
LaughBreak: Dad Jokes ‘N More
@MediocreJoker85
Joke of all trades, master of PUN. Laughter enthusiast. Serving up cringe-worthy jokes and more, tested for maximum groans around the family dinner table.
Dad Jokes
@Dadsaysjokes
Best dad jokes on twitter - we’re also on Instagram and Facebook.
Dad Jokes! 👨
@dadgivesjokes
Dad Jokes.
Bad Dad Jokes
@baddadjokes
almost 3 years ago
Toasters were the first form of pop-up notifications.
#dadjoke
#jokeoftheday
Bad Dad Jokes
@baddadjokes
almost 3 years ago
They don't watch the flintstones in Dubai. But Abu Dhabi do.
#badjoke
#dadjoke
#joke
Bad Dad Jokes
@baddadjokes
almost 3 years ago
RT
@TheMime
: ...
Bad Dad Jokes
@baddadjokes
almost 3 years ago
I just read a book about Stockholm syndrome. It was pretty bad at first, but by the end I liked it.
#dadjokes
#jokeoftheday
Bad Dad Jokes
@baddadjokes
almost 3 years ago
What did the buffalo say to his son as he left for college? Bison
Bad Dad Jokes
@baddadjokes
almost 3 years ago
Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? Its ok, he woke up.
Bad Dad Jokes
@baddadjokes
almost 3 years ago
I wear a stethoscope so that in a medical emergency I can teach people a valuable lesson about assumptions.
#dadjokes
#jokeoftheday
Bad Dad Jokes
@baddadjokes
almost 3 years ago
I just ate a frozen apple. Hardcore.
#DadmirationDay
#FathersDay
#dadjokes
#HappyFathersDay
Bad Dad Jokes
@baddadjokes
almost 3 years ago
The shovel was a ground-breaking invention.
Bad Dad Jokes
@baddadjokes
almost 3 years ago
I wear a stethoscope so that in a medical emergency I can teach people a valuable lesson about assumptions.
#dadjokes
#jokeoftheday
Bad Dad Jokes
@baddadjokes
almost 3 years ago
I've been addicted to cold turkey for 2 years. I keep telling people I'm trying to quit cold turkey but nobody is taking me seriously.
Bad Dad Jokes
@baddadjokes
almost 3 years ago
I used to have a job collecting leaves. I was raking it in.
#dadjokes
#jokeoftheday
Bad Dad Jokes
@baddadjokes
almost 3 years ago
Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? Because they're so good at it.
Bad Dad Jokes
@baddadjokes
almost 3 years ago
My dad always told me “don’t be quick to find faults”... Good man, terrible geologist.
#BadJokeFriday
#dadjokes
Bad Dad Jokes
@baddadjokes
almost 3 years ago
What do you call an elephant that doesn't matter? An irrelephant
Bad Dad Jokes
@baddadjokes
almost 3 years ago
A classic from who's line is it anyway.
#whoslineisitanyway
Bad Dad Jokes
@baddadjokes
almost 3 years ago
[Interview] "What are your strengths?" Me: I fall in love easily. "Okay... what are your weaknesses?" Me:Those blue eyes of yours.
#dadjokes
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