Teacup Tortuga

There's a skeleton inside of me.

[✰ @PRINCESSVlCKY]

my red flag is i can't survive in a casual relationship because i bring shakespearean-level devotion to a 3 day talking stage

[Teacup Tortuga @badtortuga]

I want to go to a Renaissance fair and larp, I'm not getting any younger

[Teacup Tortuga @badtortuga]

I'm just waiting for the day to tell somebody to bugger off

[Teacup Tortuga @badtortuga]

@fantizzlyastic Lol I'm glad you got the implication towards the end. How the story is written is equally, if no less important, than the story itself. You know what I mean, jellybean?

[Teacup Tortuga @badtortuga]

My next culinary endeavor is to create edible tide pods. What's your favorite flavor of soap? Mine is lavender peppermint.

[Teacup Tortuga @badtortuga]

@fantizzlyastic I wake up, regaining consciousness. I proceed to pick myself off the floor and finish the laundry.

[Teacup Tortuga @badtortuga]

@fantizzlyastic I'm instantly transported to a field. A spring meadow stretches off into the distance, beyond what is comprehensible. Flowers swayed in tandem with the wind and leaves swirled up into the air. A gentle gust gyrates to the ground, gone is the green grazing grass.

[Teacup Tortuga @badtortuga]

The line between naivete and hopefulness is almost invisible. The world is dark, so close your heart, and ruthlessness is mercy upon ourselves.

[Teacup Tortuga @badtortuga]

Sometimes I wish I still had my weighted blanket

[Teacup Tortuga @badtortuga]

Swai Florentine, white wine caper sauce, fettuccine

[Teacup Tortuga @badtortuga]

Dang, my bullshit allergy be actin' up

[Teacup Tortuga @badtortuga]

Words are flawed, but they can easily be fixed. Words exist to be thought and then formed, to be written and then revised, and even to be said and then denied. They can be misused and neglected or cared for and corrected.

[Teacup Tortuga @badtortuga]

Level up?

[Teacup Tortuga @badtortuga]

In the words of Socrates Johnson: "All we know is that we know nothing."

[Teacup Tortuga @badtortuga]

Omg guys, the waitress gave me a free glass of wine. 🥰

[Teacup Tortuga @badtortuga]

Being intolerant to the intolerant is wholly consistent.

[Teacup Tortuga @badtortuga]

I don't want to give up caffeine but my trembling hands say otherwise

[Teacup Tortuga @badtortuga]

Me if I didn't fuck up the timeline