ryan :-)

[ryan :-) @barstoolkenya]

i really be drinking beer with a limp wrist

[Victoria Rose @woahhvickyyy]

Not interested in talking stages. We can talk on the stage at our wedding

[lemon 🍋🇧🇬 @wlemonesc]

hello universities. i would like a master’s degree in Countries Flags and Capitals

[໊ @wynavira]

i always am about to go to sleep at a beautiful 11pm and then something happens to me

[Keg. @GratefulKeg]

Diego Pavia gonna be playing left field for the Savannah Bananas.

[corb @awshuqs]

mi tink me gwaan reap what mi sow

[Hollywood Deals @LocalDingus]

the mold growing in my water bottle said you would say that

[Samson Folk (the coach) @samfolkk]

yelling BAM when I throw something in the garbage bin

[ryan :-) @barstoolkenya]

@FloTrack We saw you get their pronouns wrong in the original tweet, nice save

[jake @huntichon]

If you're single on Valentine's Day it's cuz you're ugly. Don't ever forget that. If you looked better you would have the person you want

[💲🤍 @makeupbyshaniah]

how i feel making my dog unwrap a christmas gift

[BEJALVIN @bejalvin]

Taco Bell be like damn this shit is delicious take it off the menu

[ًْ @odegaardismx__]

https://t.co/iExfYIjgRy

[NBACentel @TheNBACentel]

The Warriors have announced Brandin Podziemski will stay away from the team until he’s better at basketball.

(Via @SharmsCharania)

[Errai @errai]

(after three beers) Do you guys ever feel sorta.. empty? Like you're housing a malevolent entity as a passenger in your body but have no identity or will of your own

Friend 1: you're probably just a husk man

Friend 2: vessel alert

[k. @iheartkira_]

Tuah 67%

[fawn @fawnncel]

wait why are ppl trying to normalize the infantilization of the glorification of the gentrification of the justification of the commodification of consumerism which perpetuates religion psychosis and overstimulates my niche theory

[jimmy @jimmysoldout]

Biking to dick appointment

[ty montgomery @tykingdomburner]

if i have been drinking please do not be fat around me

[the big wave @makjako]

When you drop generational brown and get a phantom wipe