Brittany Cobb

“Why tiptoe through life to arrive safely at death?”

[Brittany Cobb @bcobbYo]

I’m sorry but if cops get a bigger discount at a restaurant than their own employees on shift, that’s a huge problem.

[Brittany Cobb @bcobbYo]

How come people don’t make bangers anymore? I’m in desperate need of a 2012-2016 BANGER this summer

[Brittany Cobb @bcobbYo]

Aaron: “Your dad’s, like, AOL?”

Me: “uhhh…you mean AWOL?” 😂😂😂

[Brittany Cobb @bcobbYo]

I am disgusted with the housing market. Over HALF A MILLION DOLLARS for a canton 3 bedroom ranch, zero updates since the ‘70s, no yard AND have to pay an HOA. Like, wtf??

[Brittany Cobb @bcobbYo]

Today I learned that some tribes in Sudan rub ash on areas for hair removal. The ash doesn’t remove the hair, IT GIVES THEM A BETTER GRIP FOR WHEN THEY RIP THAT SHIT OUT OF THEIR BODY! 😳😳😳 oh hell nahh.

[Brittany Cobb @bcobbYo]

Mark: “Hey! Where’s Brendan?”

Me: “who?????”

Mark: “Ya know…Aaron.” 😂😂😂😂

[Brittany Cobb @bcobbYo]

*Aaron talking to Alex*

Aaron: “They have a statue of you in Egypt!”
Me: 🤨
Aaron: “Yeah! The stynx!”
😂😂😂

[Brittany Cobb @bcobbYo]

“Titty-mellows”😂😂

[Brittany Cobb @bcobbYo]

Me: “What makes a philosopher well known? Like, what do they have to do?”

Aaron: “I don’t know….i think you have to just make up really good quotes” 😂😂😂

[Brittany Cobb @bcobbYo]

Aaron: “Snow whites eating my ass”
Me: 🤨
Aaron: “I meant to say frosty the snowman”

😂😂😂

[Brittany Cobb @bcobbYo]

“If you can’t get it done right, get it done stupid.” 😂😂

[Brittany Cobb @bcobbYo]

Schoolcraft’s vista tech center doesn’t have WiFi??? Tf is this

[Brittany Cobb @bcobbYo]

I was laying Alex down for bed. Wished him a merry Christmas and kissed his cheek. He had the biggest gummy smile then went straight back to sleep. Melted my momma heart 🥹🥰

[Brittany Cobb @bcobbYo]

For the FIRST time in 9 months, my son peed on me.

[Brittany Cobb @bcobbYo]

@xdKenndra92 singing about @LoudLuxury possibly retweeting her “ThAAAt wOoould be SoOOooo cOOl!” 😁😁

[Brittany Cobb @bcobbYo]

“My frogs are croakin’!” @xdKenndra92

[Brittany Cobb @bcobbYo]

“Shimp” @xdKenndra92

[Brittany Cobb @bcobbYo]

Walked past the chem labs at school and they had a sign on their door saying “What is Cole’s law? Thinly sliced cabbage.” HA 😂😂

[Brittany Cobb @bcobbYo]

Aaron tried voice texting pirouette and it auto corrected it to “pure wet” 😂😂😂😂

[Brittany Cobb @bcobbYo]

“Go home away!”- mark 😂😂