K. Elizabeth ™

[K. Elizabeth ™ @beansx11]

It’s 12:21 am and I’m laying here thinking about how it’s been almost 5 fuckin years since Game of Thrones ended and I’m STILL pissed off about the ending and how much I hate Bran, that stupid fuck. I need to move on but simply *cannot*.

[K. Elizabeth ™ @beansx11]

I’m too fat for it to be this hot.

[Stuart Feiner @StuartFeiner]

I don't know how I look this good, I'm a fat fuck.

[K. Elizabeth ™ @beansx11]

And you may think, “Shouldn’t your child’s love be enough?”and the answer to that is NO. He likes his dad way more. Bye!!!!!!

[K. Elizabeth ™ @beansx11]

For my first Mother’s Day I would like A) to be left alone or B) someone to start me a gofundme because this shit ain’t free and I’m tired.

[K. Elizabeth ™ @beansx11]

I offered to host Easter which was so very stupid of me.

[K. Elizabeth ™ @beansx11]

Damn, I have not tweeted in a hot minute.

[K. Elizabeth ™ @beansx11]

@getWID_it Fuck em. You’re KILLIN EM BABBYYYY

[K. Elizabeth ™ @beansx11]

@DanteBuono deadass looked at Roman and said “If you keep looking at me like that I am going to punch you right in the face” #uncleoftheyear

[K. Elizabeth ™ @beansx11]

I’ve been trying to watch the same 1 hour episode of Law and Order since last Thursday. That’s all you need to know about what it’s like to be a parent.

[Wale @Wale]

October 22

[NFL Memes @NFLMemes]

Me checking Instagram and Facebook every 5 minutes to see if they’re no longer down…

[K. Elizabeth ™ @beansx11]

@Tayy_Biebs Omg 🙄😂

[K. Elizabeth ™ @beansx11]

Before kids I just always thought… “WHAT?? PPL JUST PUT THEIR FRICKIN BABIES TO SLEEP EVERY NIGHT AT 7PM AND THEN JUST STAY IN THE HOUSE ALL NIGHT??? Bullshit, doesn’t work that way” Until I learned that it does work that way and it is indeed still bullshit.

[MeekMill @MeekMill]

Don’t bite the hand that feed or that hand that fed you!

[K. Elizabeth ™ @beansx11]

Thank you @jj_redick, thank you so very much. Couldn’t be more proud of you & your career. I’ll miss you 🖤

[JJ Redick @jj_redick]

✌🏻 🏀

[K. Elizabeth ™ @beansx11]

@Mike_Burggraf Might lose him 🤷🏼‍♀️

[K. Elizabeth ™ @beansx11]

When ya’ll see my kid in only camo outfits this fall/winter season mind your goddamn business.

[K. Elizabeth ™ @beansx11]

I spend a lot of time sitting around thinking… Wow, I can’t believe we have a baby… @Dylly_Doodle

[K. Elizabeth ™ @beansx11]

Update: it wasn’t that. It was my gallbladder trying to escape my body 🙂

[K. Elizabeth ™ @beansx11]

Laying in bed wondering why my stomach hurts….. couldn’t be that I at lunch at 1pm, then went to work 4 hours later & pounded two cups of coffee and then got home at 11pm ate 3 chicken fingers, 2 chewy bars & a banana… no… couldn’t be that.