beastasaurus

Mentally unstable, random, and irrational tweets from the big troublemakinsky. Don't take everything seriously. I might be trying to light things up a bit.

[beastasaurus @beastasaurus1]

Opinions are like farts. Even the silent ones can be deadly. #farts #opibions #jojes #shitisay

[beastasaurus @beastasaurus1]

@IAmSteveHarvey @chrisrock Don't forget when you messed up the pageant! God Bless

[beastasaurus @beastasaurus1]

I'm going drive my car to the hotel bar, I'm gonna' DRINK 'till I can't no mo #oldtownroad

[beastasaurus @beastasaurus1]

Just call me Captain Rippinfartz

[beastasaurus @beastasaurus1]

Who farted?

[beastasaurus @beastasaurus1]

Buenos retardes people. Buenos retardes

[Stumbler Top @StumblerTop]

why is this so funny

[beastasaurus @beastasaurus1]

@SethMacFarlane Dingbat

[beastasaurus @beastasaurus1]

@rickygervais I follow for the preaching. Didn't realize there were any jokes.

[beastasaurus @beastasaurus1]

Don't eat Tide Pods before starting your around the world journey. You'll thank me later #TideAd #hourlycomicday2018

[beastasaurus @beastasaurus1]

Bigmongous is now a word. Thank you. #word #language

[beastasaurus @beastasaurus1]

Trump wants to ban the words evidence based. finally! Someone who understands me! #trump #Republican #PoliticsNation #

[beastasaurus @beastasaurus1]

I don't do anything half-assed. Full-assed for me, 100% #jokes #stupidity

[beastasaurus @beastasaurus1]

#phraseoftheday turd burglar

[beastasaurus @beastasaurus1]

I usually do things at least once, just so when my #wife says I never do something (like a shitty chore) I can back it up with facts. I may be #lazy, but I'm not a #liar.

[beastasaurus @beastasaurus1]

If #Hillary #Clinton married #Donald #Trump she would easily be the most hated person in the ����

[beastasaurus @beastasaurus1]

Does calling yourself no spin mean you can lie? Count me in. Call me no spin Beastasaurus

[beastasaurus @beastasaurus1]

"fat bottom girls"? Really now Frederick von Mercury....

[beastasaurus @beastasaurus1]

Can't call a #fatso fat but can rip on #bald men all day long.. can diet to get in shape, but can't regenerate hair on head. #assholes

[beastasaurus @beastasaurus1]

Woman spends years being lazy and fat, playing computer games and eating. Gets mad when asked to exercise #fat #logic #stupid #wife