hannah_beau

To the real mr Miyagi

[caoimhe @lovinqmount]

you raped a woman so violently that her tampon was lodged inside of her uterus & it had to be removed with forceps. shut the fuck up

[misa ࿇ @forxureyesonly]

sometimes i wanna socialise but i don’t wanna talk. i just want to be around like a cat

[grendels stepmom @himbopotamuss]

If the gods asked me to pick who was the most beautiful amongst them I would simply not do that

[James @exhaustdata]

I like it when instagram is like “you may know this account: htlsltbkrn_hhtha_iiai” and it follows zero people and has zero followers. One of my friends is up to no good and I love that for them!

[Matt Graveling @mattgraveling]

🥇History made live on the BBC!🥇

The favourite moment of my broadcasting career - Kenya's Sabastian Sawe broke the 'impossible' sub 2 hour barrier at @LondonMarathon.

I was live with @MartineBBC on @BBCNews & @BBCWorld talking about Tigst Assefa's record when Sawe flew past!🇰🇪

[BBC Sport @BBCSport]

WHAT HAVE WE JUST WITNESSED? 🤯

Sabastian Sawe has just become the first person in history to run a sub two-hour marathon in race conditions.

Yomif Kejelcha was also under two hours for second!

[inqilāb @tastefullysaucy]

“will not applaud those who set the world on fire just because they turn up with a bucket.”

[Tonka Jahari @aseisheated]

That’s a suspicious number of Kit Kats!

[teen vampire, aged 40 @witchesflight]

“Larger and healthier dogs formed a protective perimeter around a german shepherd that was severely injured and struggling to walk” I’m going to DIE

[𝐃𝐈𝐆𝐁 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 @_DIGB]

In fairness the yanks discovering Tourette’s syndrome is a step in the right direction

Just wait until they discover gun control and not electing paedophiles as their president

[Politics UK @PolitlcsUK]

🚨 PICTURED: Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor's arrest picture hanging in the Louvre

[WeRateDogs @dog_rates]

This local Wolfdog joined an Olympic ski event and triggered the finish-line camera. This is Nazgul. He snuck into a cross-country skiing sprint this morning and raced the homestretch with some competitors before being escorted home. 14/10 someone get him a medal

[Róisín Lanigan @rosielanners]

amazing to think we likely won't see another simultaneous lent, chinese new year, ramadan and disgraced member of the british royal family being arrested in our lifetime

[cants @cantseyy]

I hope it's on 24 hours in police custody

[jocelyn (swimswim4) @swimswim48]

After watching the Winter Olympics, I’ve decided that swimming doesn’t have enough life or death stakes, so starting in LA28 we’re dumping a shark in the pool

[Pxie @pxielovee]

What do you call a system where the most powerful men in the world are able to get away with the rape and murder of little girls and women? A matriarchy?

[r @tennisbish]

Winter Olympics is so crazy like everyone is either wearing knives on their feet or throwing themselves down a mountain. and then there’s curling

[chatpile roan @chatpileroan]

big tesco

[Craig. @bambibristol]

So it turns out the perverts are in private jets after all…

Everyone got a bit distracted looking in the dinghies there didn’t they?