Beefmaster

One man, with wife, working the world

[Beefmaster @beefmaster]

it would be amazing if Home Depot or Lowes could let you build a shopping list or reminder in their phone app, and the moment you walk in the door you get a popup notifcation with all the items you needed to get but had forgotten about.

[Beefmaster @beefmaster]

School has been over for 2 hours. Im going to be taking bets on how long it takes before I hear "Im bored" or "what can I do" from the kids

[Beefmaster @beefmaster]

#Rooster, Steve Carell has a beautiful way of making you laugh and cry at the same time. And become incredibly invested in these fictional people finding actual happiness in life.

[Beefmaster @beefmaster]

It’s a beautiful morning to wake up to the best record in baseball @Cubs

[Beefmaster @beefmaster]

Why is it, every time I walk through Publix produce section, I feel the need to release a little toot. I look around, no women present. It smells absolutely awful, and lo and behold, a women come around the corner from the cereal aisle right into my bloodbath.

[Beefmaster @beefmaster]

Does anyone else in their 40's stop in the middle of email or text, and wonder if they are using a certain word correctly, and realize they aren't really sure of the definition to begin with. And then wonder if its been used wrong their entire life???

[Beefmaster @beefmaster]

If a man takes 10 seconds to figure out how to “push”
open the door to leave Chipotle, that should be the biggest red flag for a woman.

[Beefmaster @beefmaster]

Dude tried Naruto running???

[Defiant L’s @DefiantLs]

Trump shares footage of the White House Correspondents’ Dinner shooting and shooter on the ground

[Beefmaster @beefmaster]

@AndrewBaydala I said the same thing about the Super Bowl. Its not a bad thing to anticipate building delays, and possibly give the city a year or 2 to work out the technical and logistical hurdles the stadium will create.

[Beefmaster @beefmaster]

Is NASA intentionally making this live show as boring as possible?

[Beefmaster @beefmaster]

@ElectionWiz again? This is like the 4th time.

[Beefmaster @beefmaster]

@ElectionWiz also explains why daily freight rates have doubled since January (pre Iran)

[Beefmaster @beefmaster]

@3HL1045 a NBA team at Bridgestone would also severely limit the amount of concerts the building could host.

[Beefmaster @beefmaster]

@ClayTravis some airlines you cant check your bag in that early.

[Beefmaster @beefmaster]

Asking for a friend; is this the one day it’s okay to pinch women without being arrested?

[Beefmaster @beefmaster]

I assume the Air Force can’t listen to music while in the air, but I kinda wonder what a bombing run playlist would include? Like Kenny Loggins and Beastie Boys Sabotage on repeat?

[Beefmaster @beefmaster]

@Outkick The 2 people in Air Force uniform look like they are trying to not get in trouble by being in this photo.😄

[Beefmaster @beefmaster]

Seems like the men are trying to not be outdone by the women and are immediately unzipping their onesie’s too. Only to expose their hairy chests.

[Beefmaster @beefmaster]

@ClayTravis interesting pick your poison choice. Rot your liver, or your lungs. Lose your self control or care and concern.

[Beefmaster @beefmaster]

@bkoo at least this is better than WWE's ESPN rollout?