Story time
I’m telling my mom about these Hot Cocoa Hershey’s Kisses that are amazing but hard to find so i googled them.
Come to find out I mistyped and googled “Hot Cock Hershey’s Kisses” in front of my mom. I’ll leave the rest to your imagination..
My 6 year old cousin: what are you doing?
Me: putting on my concealer
Cuz: what does that do?
Me: it hides my dark circles under my eyes
Cuz: umm i can still see them
Girls on Twitter: thank you, next.
Girl in real life: thank you, come back in a week, after I’ve done nothing but talk about how toxic you and our relationship was, so we can do this again in a couple of weeks.
Sometimes I wish Netflix offered a “pick random” and wouldn’t let you change it until you watched half of it. Because literally i will never stop picking the office.
Shelbyville please tell me how Popeyes (our 4th chicken fast food place) has went up in 3 weeks yet the building with Dunkin’ Donuts is getting nowhere. Priorities.
Greyhound racing was banned in Florida yesterday. Regardless of your views on racing, this means about 8000 hounds will be looking for homes in the coming months. They are wonderful, kind, sweet, and sleepy dogs, and in the wake of this please consider opening your home to one.