benj clews

Software writerer, banjo pluckist and horror movie dork.

[benj clews @benjclews]

I met Les Dennis in WHSmith’s in Dulwich. He was stuffing all the razz mags down his trousers and high on Sherbert Fountains. He ran out without paying, punched a pensioner off a scooter and drove off giggling. Later on I heard he ramraided the local dog shelter maiming 2 collies

[benj clews @benjclews]

To anyone with even the slightest grasp of English, this notification is absolute gibberish.

[benj clews @benjclews]

@empiremagazine Seems to know his stuff but throughout this whole video all I could think was: did someone stick both Sam Worthington and Willem Dafoe through The Fly’s teleportation machine and Travis Knight came out the other side?

[benj clews @benjclews]

@RippleXrpie “President Trump recognized the problems with who IMMEDIATELY. One of his very first executive orders of his SECOND term…” Which one is it? Immediately or 4 years down the line into his presidency?

[Empire @empiremagazine]

Peter Dinklage has joined Noah Hawley's Alien: Earth Season 2 as a series regular.

Production on the sci-fi series' second outing is due to get underway next month.

Read more: https://t.co/fhX0caNDrl

[benj clews @benjclews]

On the #trump coin, why are there 6 stars besides his right hand and 7 besides his left. Seems weird to be non-symmetrical like that unless Trump’s trying to get in on the whole 6-7, 6-7 thing… about 6 months late.

[benj clews @benjclews]

@FreelandGlinda @HorrorCalendar Was wondering the same thing. Seems to be Bodycam

[benj clews @benjclews]

@premierinn Your Macclesfield North branch was unable to provide any breakfast yesterday morning despite us having paid for it. I was assured we’d get a refund but no sign yet. I’m now trying to ring them but nobody ever answers the phone. Can you please chase this up?

[MONDO @MondoNews]

Available for a limited time, our MOTU200X - Skeletor 1/12 Scale Figure - Timed Edition includes exclusive extras like an additional floating skull portrait, Havoc Staff and environmental base!

Pre-order now through Tuesday, Jan. 6 at 11 AM CT … only at https://t.co/dZWP0wsNP3

[benj clews @benjclews]

For anyone wondering what Andy Serkis interrogating Claudia Winkleman would look like look no further than #albania #bbceurovision

[benj clews @benjclews]

I fucking hate Tim Westwood #sanmarino #BBCEurovision

[benj clews @benjclews]

Wow, Keiran Culkin and James Van Der Beek just rocked it #sweden #BBCEurovision

[benj clews @benjclews]

@empiremagazine The reviewer seems to think a film that frequently references the events of and includes characters from the previous films is a reboot. By this standard every franchise is just a series of reboots.

[benj clews @benjclews]

#finaldestinationbloodlines is a gleeful explosion of gore that kept the tone & brutal dark humour of the 5th film whilst cunningly toying with your expectations built from the franchise. I loved every blood-drenched second of it. Top marks go to the MRI scanner scene🪦

[benj clews @benjclews]

Screw you Music Magpie. £8 for a MacBook Pro because of some imaginary dust under the screen that apparently affects the operation. I was still happily developing iOS apps on this thing only a week ago.

[benj clews @benjclews]

@ThreeUK Can I confirm you no longer do the weekly Cineworld ticket for £3 offer? I’ve not seen the offer for several weeks now😞

[benj clews @benjclews]

@AshySlasheeDB It’s hard to see this one ever get beaten & it usually tops the list of greatest jump scares. A similarly effective scare is the lawnmower scene in Sinister. I’d also mention the final seconds of Saint Maud… that by weird coincidence also appeared in Midnight Mass a year later.

[benj clews @benjclews]

@stopvaccinating (Cont.) Then combine that with the number of amateur physicians (I.e. every kid’s mum) and you have skyrocketing autism diagnoses.

[benj clews @benjclews]

@stopvaccinating (Cont.) Some of these are things like being a picky eater, being quiet, not understanding idioms, not looking at or talking to adults. I knew (and was) a kid who did all these things but in the 80s this wasn’t autism it was just being an awkward child (Cont.)

[benj clews @benjclews]

@stopvaccinating Simply put, we’ve widened the definition of autism. When I was a kid in the 80s it was basically someone who struggled to get around in the world like in Rain Man. Now there’s a 6 page questionnaire (I have one for my kid) of possible indicators. (Cont.)

[benj clews @benjclews]

@HorrorCalendar Ah, yes- the hilarious musical that is Heretic. Had me rolling in the aisles and whistling the final showstopping number all the way home…