Ben Johns

I had a pet rock once, it ran away.

[Ben Johns @benjohns55]

When you go the extra mile for a customer and they don't hit you with the fatty tip.

[Alzheimer's Association @alzassociation]

"It’s sad having so many memories of someone you love and that person not remember them." Raise Alzheimer's awareness in honor of someone you love using #Every65Seconds.

[Won't You Be My Neighbor? @MrRogersMovie]

See how a little kindness makes a world of difference. Won't You Be My Neighbor? is an intimate look at America’s favorite neighbor: Mister Fred Rogers.

Watch the trailer and see it in select theaters June 8th. #MrRogersMovie

[Ben Johns @benjohns55]

Who's trying to pull up like the Jetsons in the new whip? https://t.co/e0JH3qyRrb

[Ben Johns @benjohns55]

Chaotic neutral. Duh. https://t.co/33K81wa3lY

[Waypoint @waypoint]

is yoshi good or bad

[Meghan McCain @MeghanMcCain]

My father doesn’t need torture explained to him. https://t.co/ajrtr7Vn5A

[Fred @WaywardWinifred]

Good luck trying to beat this guy in 2020. Good luck. https://t.co/aAT3Ono7E4

[Nicole Zhu @nicolelzhu]

rip stephen hawking, a brilliant mind and deliverer of sick burns

[DJBooth @DJBooth]

dream collabs (via @rickegidius)

[David Hogg 🟧 @davidhogg111]

Simply put politians do not care about our generation because young people 18-29 don't vote and that's a huge reason why we have the student debt problem, environmental problems and gun violence because we show our political leaders they can get away with what they want NO MORE

[Snoop Dogg @SnoopDogg]

Boss 👊🏾🔥

[Karen Snyder @themamadominus]

Dear Mr. Ryan - Social Security is money taken out of paychecks, it is not a donation to the US made by taxpayers. It is not something to be privatized, like prisons, so that rich people can make money "managing" it.

[Eric Nathan @BarstoolNate]

Never forget how funny the transcripts from Martin Shkreli's jury selection were

[jacksfilms @jacksfilms]

S
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[Omni ☕️ @InfernoOmni]

Recipe for Stagnation:

- 2 cups of indecisiveness
- 1 liter of self-doubt
- 3 teaspoons of overthinking
- A gallon of self-induced stress

Simmer over several hrs of overindulging on social media while comparing one's self worth through other people's success.

👩‍🍳Enjoy!👨‍🍳

[Ben Johns @benjohns55]

Me when people say they don't like cats https://t.co/UVWywsWbnP

[James Doleman @jamesdoleman]

Sun reveals that University "snowflakes" understand the key questions raised in a novel.

[HeyIt'sVadim 🍉🍉🍉 @HeyItsVadim]

I say that after Martin Shkreli's two million dollar Wu-Tang album is seized by the state it should promptly be handed over to @theneedledrop for immediate review.

[David Yankovich @DavidYankovich]

A picture is worth a thousand words and here are a few of mine.
Today, @IronStache was arrested standing up for people against Speaker Ryan.

In 8 months he will take Paul Ryan’s job. He is every bit the badass you think he is.