ben

spider

[ben @benstoppedby]

Wait I just found out that all 5 of the Snow Buddies are nepotism babies omg 😭 their mom is Molly and their dad is an athlete dog lol

[ben @benstoppedby]

@pingu4ll original

[swinky @swinkying]

you’re on Very thick ice with me . i love you

[ben @benstoppedby]

a man named Rhys – charming. intelligent. worldly.
a man named Reese – trash. broke. dumbfuck.

[ben @benstoppedby]

Saying “you tricked me!” at the slightest inconvenience

[ben @benstoppedby]

@mattrum91 @meladoodle top tier joke tbh

[ben @benstoppedby]

April showers bring May showers bring June showers bring July heat death

[ben @benstoppedby]

@GianmarcoSoresi I’m looking for this Ted joke but can’t find it, would love to see if you can find it anywhere

[ben @benstoppedby]

I want a jeep. I don’t like jeeps, but I want to start a rubber duck collection passively.

[ben @benstoppedby]

single as a pringle? man there’s like 20 of those things in every can

[Tomris Laffly @TomiLaffly]

The hill I’m going to die on is, The Academy’s social media account shouldn’t be written in first-person with everyday internet speak. You are *The Academy*. And that should mean something. You are not a 20-something influencer trying to have an online brand.

[ben @benstoppedby]

Christmas? This needs to stop. It hasn’t even been A Very Jonas Thanksgiving yet.

[ben @benstoppedby]

@inspectorrrrr @mrswamsbsgans Yep! Great song

[ben @benstoppedby]

Corporate life gets even more ridiculous once you realize most of the people on any given call probably have to pee

[Sam Brodey @sambrodey]

the Mahdi will be aware of things others cannot see

[ben @benstoppedby]

camera roll will be like “look at this photo from 2016” and this will be the picture

[ben @benstoppedby]

future The Cut article: “I used to date the Hawk Tuah girl. She never once made that sound.”

[ben @benstoppedby]

Brands love to ruin a good t-shirt by putting their stupid name on it

[ben @benstoppedby]

They’re both the Seth Meyers Brothers, like they’re both the Super Mario Bros. I don’t make the rules

[ben @benstoppedby]

You’ve got rizz. I’ve got Skyrizi. We are not the same.

[ben @benstoppedby]

A “Sophie’s Paula’s Choice” is when inflation forces you to choose between two fancy skincare products

[ben @benstoppedby]

me: dog park?

my cool dog: who’s gonna be there