chilly snow master

accidental ski bum

[chilly snow master @berntbiscuit]

An irony/dick joke, now that’s a rusty dong 🤔

[chilly snow master @berntbiscuit]

Twitter used to be a funny clusterfuck and now it’s just sad so I’m deleting this app until further notice. Catch me on insta for uplifting mountain pics. 😇

[chilly snow master @berntbiscuit]

Take one step off the plane and immediately feel the swamp ass, must be the east coast!

[chilly snow master @berntbiscuit]

This is the most insane insta ad I don’t even know what it does but it’s beautiful

[chilly snow master @berntbiscuit]

Forget flights, I need credit card rewards for concert tickets 💰💰💰

[chilly snow master @berntbiscuit]

In 2011 I was soo jealous that Marge had this car 🔥

[chilly snow master @berntbiscuit]

I’ll call it deepfriedmathproblems

[chilly snow master @berntbiscuit]

I’m going to start an Instagram account of all the times I use math (Algebra 1) at my job to inspire them to dream and achieve ✨💫

[chilly snow master @berntbiscuit]

Best Erin snaps (selfies) of late

[chilly snow master @berntbiscuit]

Post 3-hour zoom meeting poops are the new post coffee poops

[chilly snow master @berntbiscuit]

Everyone works with that one person that makes you:
☑️ text ~John Smith~ to look at the email I sent him

[chilly snow master @berntbiscuit]

Today my friend sent me a snap that was like
😳 “omg so embarrassed I just referred to Rocky mtn cannabis dispensary as roots rx”
And that is the most niche thing I’ve ever heard someone be embarrassed about 🍁

[chilly snow master @berntbiscuit]

Contemplating the cultural shock that would ensue if I were to make and bring Cookie Pudding to a dinner party tomorrow

[nico @verycutedog]

Wes Anderson should STOP making movies and START designing high concept putt putt courses in the myrtle beach area

[chilly snow master @berntbiscuit]

processed breakfast has come full circle eh

[chilly snow master @berntbiscuit]

I tracked it down. Pic will drop later.

[chilly snow master @berntbiscuit]

• ordered a new bong on eBay
• USPS took it to a whole different post office than my PO box
• package was picked up yesterday
• some local old lady currently using scientific glass to measure pancake water

[melissa lozada-oliva @ellomelissa]

Aesthetically I love this image: the symmetry of the coca colas, the muted corner they’re in, she looks like an alien fem bot, he looks like the guy who accidentally brought her to life by tripping over a wire while wasted; it’s pure Americana

[chilly snow master @berntbiscuit]

Bailed on the weekly skin last Wed bc it was 4° with 35 mph winds.
Joke’s on me bc today, it’s -4° with 15mph winds and we are going 🥲💨

[chilly snow master @berntbiscuit]

Love to hear the ski lodge playing Steely Dan’s Peg while I take my pre ski poop and play wordle