Rick

Paid crisis actor.Specialist in looking injured in disaster zones,playing an under suspicion family member.

[Rick @bertdernernert]

[Bullies] oh here he is, Gormless.

[Me, with three gorms hidden in my pocket] well gentlemen I think you'll find you're sadly mistaken......

[Rick @bertdernernert]

Somebody somewhere is scripting a tiresome Cool Runnings type film as well speak

[Rick @bertdernernert]

SCOREAÇAO!

[Sky News @SkyNews]

The US president will celebrate his 80th birthday with a UFC fight on the White House lawn.

Sky's @Stone_SkyNews takes a tour of Washington and explains all the ways in which the president is making his mark on the city

[Rick @bertdernernert]

@Danny_McMoomins No point in sitting with kids when they're playing games because they DO IT WRONG and DON'T LISTEN.

[Rick @bertdernernert]

My phone just told me that this is the name of the Swiss National Anthem

[Rick @bertdernernert]

@SkyNews Let's hope it's captured and killed before it bites a paddling toddler

[mooms : WCP (world cup pervert) @Danny_McMoomins]

@JohnCleese You should beheading for a care home.

[Rick @bertdernernert]

Feeling slightly off today and have bowling and crazy golf booked

[Chris @flatus74]

Elon Musk’s probably going to go out and buy a massive new telly this morning

[Rick @bertdernernert]

@flatus74 @Danny_McMoomins Go for the £5.50 premium Tesco meal deal, finding that his clubcard has logged out for some reason and not being arsed signing back in meaning he has to pay £6.

[Rick @bertdernernert]

@BBCNews My sources indicate that it's to save money so the BBC can house immigrants in that postbox Dr Who flies around in. Shocking if so.

[Rick @bertdernernert]

I don't care if you've washed the plates/cutlery in the office sink and left them neatly on the side. I'm washing mine again before I use them.

[Rick @bertdernernert]

blumber

[Rick @bertdernernert]

Looks like the type of person not allowed near playgrounds if you ask me

[Rick @bertdernernert]

@BBCNews

[mooms : WCP (world cup pervert) @Danny_McMoomins]

Had a proper look at the world cup fixtures for the first time.

Some of those games are for massive perverts.

Iran vs New Zealand at 2am on a Tuesday stands out. That'll separate the leisuremen from the employed.

[Fisted Away @fistedaway]

Please: be respectful of the host nation’s culture and traditions

[Rick @bertdernernert]

(Great train robber)

[Rick @bertdernernert]

@Free20Joy @SkyNews Need to send out a message

[Rick @bertdernernert]

@TwellsRob @SkyNews So we can get the nuclear weapon of course!