Atheist Abe

Newly converted atheist... let's do this!!!

[Atheist Abe @bestatheist]

Got a little adrenaline rush today from not praying over my lunch

[Atheist Abe @bestatheist]

my maid finally finished sanitizing all my fedoras.

[Atheist Abe @bestatheist]

jesus walking on water? let me go ahead and easily debunk this:

he was standing on two sea turtles.

#atheism

[Atheist Abe @bestatheist]

god ghosted us. renounce him.

[Atheist Abe @bestatheist]

if jesus fed bread and stinky fish to 5,000 people, AT LEAST one of them should’ve had traces of fish juice and/or bread crumbs on their mouths and shirts. to the best of my knowledge, no evidence of that exists. #atheism

[Atheist Abe @bestatheist]

honestly this scientology and mormonism thing is lookin pretty cool...

[Atheist Abe @bestatheist]

when the h8ers ask for proof, proof is what you give them.

[Atheist Abe @bestatheist]

really, jesus? just endless fish and bread for a crowd of 5,000? try showing up with some cocktail sauce for once in your life and maybe i’ll denounce my atheism

[Atheist Abe @bestatheist]

got one finger in my mouth and one in my asshole as i stare at an upside-down cross

[Atheist Abe @bestatheist]

on google today to figure how to do something i should've done long ago

[Atheist Abe @bestatheist]

fuck god

[Atheist Abe @bestatheist]

am i crazy or shouldn't the book of Lamentations be LameNATED?

[Atheist Abe @bestatheist]

praise be to Judas......lol

[Atheist Abe @bestatheist]

should I pray? no way.

[Atheist Abe @bestatheist]

i sat on a glass jar tonight

[Atheist Abe @bestatheist]

a beautiful day for ripping out ur pubes and glueing them to ur forehead.

[Atheist Abe @bestatheist]

what's everyone's favorite porn? mine is nipple porn

[Atheist Abe @bestatheist]

i love taking showers and touching myself.

[Atheist Abe @bestatheist]

never sit on a toilet where u think the church janitor mightve put a snake in it... i got my asshole bit. lol

[Atheist Abe @bestatheist]

what if god is a lizard in the woods

[Atheist Abe @bestatheist]

whew! so last nite me & the church janitor spent hours eatin beef jerky & pooping into Easter eggs. we gonna scatter em around the park lol