Bethany Berg

mother of five, father of two (she/her)

[Greg Wohlwend @aeiowu]

I made this little app that lets you scroll/flash text at really long distances. It's called Shout Screen and it's completely free, no ads and on iOS and Android.

A drop in the ocean for the engoodification of software hopefully.

https://t.co/xsPCvMGdag

https://t.co/6KDtCeEfn7

[Bethany Berg @bethanymberg]

you should be able to take work off if you had a big steak the night before

[Bethany Berg @bethanymberg]

nirvana is reached through airport beer 🙏📿🧎‍♀️‍➡️

[Bethany Berg @bethanymberg]

nothing makes me more upset than my laptop telling me it’s on low battery. like who the hell do you think you are??

[Bethany Berg @bethanymberg]

can’t believe anyone would be antipasta - I’m pro pasta all the way

[Bethany Berg @bethanymberg]

don’t test me brother I’ve been taking pop quizzes all week

[Greg Wohlwend @aeiowu]

chipotle mayo needs to be put to a stop

[Bethany Berg @bethanymberg]

we found love in a hopeless place (the Hinge app)

[Bethany Berg @bethanymberg]

will the horrors ever stop ensuing?

[Bethany Berg @bethanymberg]

please retweet this so I don't get fired

[Claritin @Claritin]

Pollen is the leading cause of seasonal allergies. That’s why we’re partnering with the @arborday to get more female trees planted across the nation.

[Sodastream @SodaStreamUSA]

sparkling all night long ✨

[Bethany Berg @bethanymberg]

I’m often reminded of these words of wisdom my former boss had for me: “not everything you see on TikTok is true”

[Bethany Berg @bethanymberg]

my sexuality is pining

[Bethany Berg @bethanymberg]

I’ll never forget the time I asked a woman where we’ve met before (thinking we had talked at a party or something) and she said “I was in Wet Hot American Summer”

[Bethany Berg @bethanymberg]

him: what’s one thing you’d change about your body? 😜
me: hm well I get this eczema-

[Bethany Berg @bethanymberg]

@rachsyme British reality show Come Dine With Me

[Bethany Berg @bethanymberg]

my greatest fear is having my texts read in court. it's the only thing keeping me from breaking the law

[Bethany Berg @bethanymberg]

get yourself a body that Phantom Threads you (becomes so fed up with u working it simply shuts down)

[Bethany Berg @bethanymberg]

I don’t want to know what you think of you. I want to know what that person you went on three dates with thinks of you

[Bethany Berg @bethanymberg]

There should be a dating app where your profile is just peer reviews